Issues 101-120

#101: Tiara Sign Of Oppression, Declare Feminists [The Prelapsarian State; ed:Sirocco]
The Issue
@@NAME@@’s upcoming hosting of a major international beauty pageant has upset some citizens concerned about the message it puts across.

The Debate
1. “These beauty pageants are a disgrace to women everywhere!” shouts feminist campaigner, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “They objectify the female body and re-enforce negative stereotyping! They celebrate the appearance instead of the personality! What message is this sending out to our children? Do we want them to think shallowness and vanity are virtues? Ban beauty contests! We must focus the education of our progeny on ethics and equality or suffer the consequences!”
The Result: all beauty contests have been banned.
Taxes +1

2. “I agree that the pageants should be banned,” pontificates renowned moralist, the Ever So Slightly Reverend @@RANDOMNAME@@. “But purely in the name of moral decency! All those fashion stores that sponsor these contests make lots of money from this blasphemy and that is just plain wrong! These women wear revealing clothing that seek to entice and seduce young men. As such, we should go a step further, and institute a dress code! Long, plaid skirts for the girls, with necklines that never drop below the base of the neck! Only then will the women of our nation be cleansed of sin!”
The Result: women who display their ankles are shunned by society.
Taxes +2

3. “What in the name of all that’s decent and good are you talking about?” exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, leader of the egalitarian civil rights movement ‘Everyone Is Equal, Dammit’. “Obviously these pageants will always be sexist unless they’re open to everyone. Admiring women only for their beauty is an insult to their intelligence and the beauty of men! It’s dually sexist! Open up the pageant to both sexes!”
The Result: Max Barry is this year’s Miss NATION.
Civil Rights +1

4. “Agh, no, no boys please, let’s just host the pageant as is, alright?” implores Catherine Gratwick, one of @@NAME@@’s most celebrated models. “No matter what you people think, appearance is important! Mine allows me to pay for all the dresses I want! So no, I don’t think there’s anything wrong with telling kids that you can make money from being pretty. In fact, I think beauty contests should be held at schools every year!”
The Result: vanity is considered the eighth cardinal virtue.
Civil Rights +1

—————————————————————————–
#102: For Whom The Road Tolls [Ta Kala; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
A group of transport analysts have suggested that a charge of five @@CURRENCY@@s a day for vehicular access to @@NAME@@’s most congested inner-cities during peak hours is the only way to solve their ever-growing traffic problem.

The Debate
1. “Similar schemes have been very effective elsewhere,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, @@NAME@@’s most infamous traffic warden. “It’s common sense that the best way to curb dangerously high demand is to raise the price of the supply – or, as in this case, to create a price. Charging citizens to go into more congested areas could, combined with the improvements to public transport it will finance, actually make people choose public transport over their cars. I don’t see why people shouldn’t pay tax for a little less traffic on our roads.”
The Result: motorists must pay to enter inner-cities during peak hours.
Taxes -2

2. “These tolls are a preposterous idea,” argues road lobbyist, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Public transport will never replace the car – I don’t want to be forced to share my space with a bunch of malodorous working-class people on my way to work. Not that I would be, because I could afford the charge, but really, it’s the principle of the matter! The only solution is to expand urban road networks. True, some pavements and green spots would have to go, but those pedestrians should be able to put up with that if they’re to expect @@NAME@@ to be part of the modern world.”
The Result: new urban roads are threatening city parks.
Taxes -2

3. “Allowing cars to scoot around and pollute our cities was a bad idea in the first place,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a famous environmentalist. “The solution is to restrict private transport to main roads and motorways whilst funding a major urban public transport scheme. Our buses and undergrounds could be the envy of the world! Yes, the car companies will suffer a little, and yes, there’ll be a bit more tax, but wouldn’t it be worth it for a bit of fresh air and safe streets for the children?”
The Result: cars are banned from built-up areas.
Taxes +2

—————————————————————————–
#103: Plague Of The Hybrids! [Serenthis; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
Angry farmers have taken to the streets demanding the government to act after reported sightings of strange @@ANIMAL@@-like dogs eating all the crops in fields.

The Debate
1. “This unholy union should never have taken place to begin with,” comments @@RANDOMNAME@@, an angry farmer. “The @@ANIMAL@@ was never meant to mate with a dog! They eat my crops, they attack my livestock and they’re breeding so quickly they’re swamping the environment! We can’t make a living like this! You’ve got to give us the funds and manpower to shoot anything that comes within a mile of our property and put an end to these freaks of nature! We must wipe these creatures out now or before you know it all we’ll be eating is fish.”
The Result: wildlife near farms is slowly becoming extinct.
Economy +2

2. “We can’t just destroy these creatures!” exclaimed @@RANDOMNAME@@, owner of @@NAME@@’s biggest safari park. “They may look ugly to you, but I think they’re just beautiful. We need to study them and understand them; think of what we could learn! These wonderful beasts may be a little harmful to the environment, but think of the people who will flock to see them! It would be an educational experience! Think of the money!”
The Result: bizarre-looking creatures called animaldogs’ dominate wildlife preserves.

3. “We could always just kill off all the dogs,” @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the “Keep The Species Pure” foundation whispers to you in a conversation. “The @@ANIMAL@@ is one of the many things our country is famous for; any perversion of its image reflects upon us all! We can’t have their image spoilt by these ugly abominations! Just get the police to go around and kill them all and we can rest easy knowing our countryside is safe!
The Result: needs to be updated

—————————————————————————–
#104: Public Loudspeakers Shrill With Controversy [Alpha Centauri; ed:Sirocco]
The Issue
A recent poll on putting up huge loudspeakers in @@NAME@@’s cities for public government broadcasts has been brought to your attention.

The Debate
1. “This idea is brilliant, and @@NAME@@ can’t afford to pass it up,” claims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Safety. “These loudspeakers can assure the public that the government is always here to help them. The potential here, to immediately warn citizens of an emergency such as an earthquake or a stampede of @@ANIMAL@@s or something, simply must be taken into account! This could save lives! And I suppose, when there isn’t anything the citizens need to be told, you could always use them to broadcast patriotic messages like ‘@@SLOGAN@@’ and inform the good people which party to join and vote for with newsbriefs and such. It’ll be worth it to strengthen the populace’s devotion to our glorious nation!”
The Result: public loudspeakers constantly tell citizens they are “happy people”.
Taxes +4
Corruption +1

2. “I think people need to realise what this really is: brainwashing!” retorts @@RANDOMNAME@@, a wealthy marketer. “I don’t want to hear all this flag-waving hogwash every time I go out for a walk. But when it comes to emergencies, I do agree that something should be done to warn everyone: we should send out messages on mandatory minature radios that you can carry in your pocket. It could tell you things you need to know too, like what shoes to buy and such.”
The Result: citizens are bombarded with advertising from their compulsory miniature radios.
Economy +20

3. “To be honest, I can’t see why we should put up with advertising at all,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an anti-business protester. “All it is is some multi-billionaire or politician somewhere trying to make even more money while the rest of us struggle to make ends meet. I say we ban it. Maybe the economy will suffer a little and some people may lose jobs but that’s just a minor side-effect really, especially when you consider that no longer will our children be encouraged to fill themselves with junk-food because some guy on the telly tells them it’s cool!”
The Result: all forms of advertising are banned.
Economy -20
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————–
#105: Compensation Culture Must End, Say Corporations [Zhudor; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
After a recent spate of high-profile lawsuits against corporations concerning the safety of their products, corporations have appealed to the government to change the laws of compensation.

The Debate
1. “It’s crazy!” cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of Sharp ‘n’ Pointy Things Incorporated. “These people should simply not be allowed to put the blame on us if they mindlessly abuse our products! I’d have thought it would be common sense not to stick your hand in a blender to ‘see if it was working properly’. We need to outlaw these ridiculous lawsuits so I can get on with my business and those working in the law profession can get on with theirs.”
The Result: corporations cut costs by taking away safety-features on their products.
Economy +2
Taxes -2

2. “I’m almost inclined to agree,” muses @@RANDOMNAME@@, a nearby firefighter. “People really should know better than to dry their cats in the microwave oven. But it’s also that microwave oven that should not start a fire if one leaves it running overnight. Let’s just put higher national safety standards in place that all products must be certified to meet. The extra expense shouldn’t worry people if it’s the difference between life and death after all.”
The Result: every product goes through extensive safety-testing by the government.
Economy -1
Taxes +2

3. “There’s nothing wrong with victims getting a little money for the damage they’ve suffered,” claims @@RANDOMNAME@@, @@NAME@@’s most notorious lawyer. “In fact we should be increasing court capacities so everyone with a complaint to file won’t have to wait long before they can get before a judge. Sure it’ll be expensive to implement, but maybe then the manufacturers will think twice before selling their unsafe junk without explaining things clearly in the manuals!”
The Result: manufacturers are sued for almost anything not covered in their catalogue-sized manuals.
Economy -7
Taxes +5

—————————————————————————–
#106: Give The Red Light District The Green Light? [Lmaortfmolia; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
After a recent survey discovered that nearly 40% of all citizens in @@NAME@@ are single, there has been an increasingly loud call for the legalisation of prostitution.

The Debate
1. “I just can’t get a girl no matter what I do,” laments acne-afflicted nerd, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If the cops would just look the other way about prostitution, it’d make my life much easier. Yeah, I’d be risking all sorts of diseases, but it’s my body isn’t it?”
The Result: sales of fishnet stockings have reached a record high.
Civil Rights +5
Economy +1
Taxes -1

2. “We can’t allow this to happen!” protests Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, senior pathologist of @@NAME@@’s largest hospital. “Prostitution is a dangerous business and must remain illegal! People need to be more aware of the consequences that could follow like the risk of contracting HIV, chlamydia, or even syphilis. I say we get some funding for a large awareness programme on sexually transmitted diseases and maybe then people will act responsibly between the covers. It’ll be expensive sure, but well worth it.”
The Result: an enormous health awareness programme is underway.
Economy -2
Taxes +1

3. “Not so fast now!” interjects daring entrepreneur, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Why don’t we just have the prostitution industry run by the government? By letting the government regulate prostitution, @@NAME@@ can force any patrons to undergo tests for diseases, make prostitutes have regular medical check-ups and pay a portion of their profits to the government. Of course we’d still have to put more policemen on the streets to keep illegal brothels from popping up and make sure the hospitals are equipped to handle the extra workload, but you can always raise taxes to account for that.”
The Result: needs to be updated

—————————————————————————–
#107: Private Lab Holds @@NAME@@’s Sick To Ransom [Silverbrook; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
Scientists at a private medical research laboratory have announced that they have produced a drug which will combat @@NAME@@’s most notorious malady – Spon Plague.

The Debate
1. “This pill is the only known and unknown cure for the Spon Plague!” proclaims Professor @@RANDOMNAME@@, the inventor of the cure. “But if we are to go ahead with the production of this drug, we must get some government support. We’re set to make a fortune from this drug – the money we earn will help us develop even more cures for other as-yet untreatable diseases. Some people won’t be able to afford it of course, but hard cheese on them: they should have got a paying job while they were still capable.”
The Result: only the rich can afford the latest medical innovations.
Corruption +1
Health -2
Income Equality -6
Lifespan -1
Public Healthcare -1
Unexpected Death Rate +1
Weather -2

2. “That’s a disgraceful way to think!” says equal rights activist, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “So the people who need the most help shouldn’t get any? I propose that the government subsidises the production of all drugs so everyone can benefit from them, rich or not! That way the money-hungry corporations won’t profit from the suffering of the masses. Of course there will be the matter of a small tax rise to fund it – but what’s that when lives will be saved?”
The Result: pharmacies close down as medicinal drugs are sold freely by the government.
Civil Rights -1
Economy -12
Taxes +2
Authoritarianism +0.016
Business Subsidization -2
Employment -17
Health +0.5
Ideological Radicality -3
Income Equality +9
Most Pro-Market -2
Obesity -41
Pacifism +2
Public Healthcare +4
Rudeness -1
Safety +3
Toxicity -5
Wealth Gaps -1
Weather +3

3. “I can’t believe what I’m hearing,” deplores well-respected religious leader, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If God didn’t want people to have this disease he wouldn’t have created it in the first place. This is completely against the will of God and if the government allows this drug to go on sale we will all be doomed to an afterlife in a dark and fiery place! Now let’s end this madness and abolish the production of pharmaceuticals and drugs altogether!”
The Result: the religious lobby has the power of veto over health initiatives.
Civil Rights -3
Godlessnedd -2
Religiousness +1

—————————————————————————–
#108: Gambling Interests Offer High Stakes [New Sweden X; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
In light of @@NAME@@’s ban on gambling, people ranging from angry homemakers to allegedly legitimate businessmen have been arguing incessantly about whether or not banning casinos was a good idea.

The Debate
1. “We are highly distressed at your decision to revoke our casino licences,” says FamilyCorp. Representative “Fat Tony” @@RANDOMNAME@@, while sipping a glass of fine wine. “If the ban were to be revoked, think of all the money you could get from your cut of the profit. In addition, it would help ensure the safety of assorted members of @@NAME@@’s government. I think this is an offer that you should not refuse.”
The Results: rumor has it that the government was paid off by the mob to allow casinos to reopen.
Economy +16
Taxes -1

2. “These casinos cannot be allowed to reopen!” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an ex-gambling addict. “Remember what happened last time? People get out of control and lose their life’s savings! Just say no to these so-called legitimate businesses! And crack down on the rest of organized crime while you’re at it.”
The Results: the mob and the police have recently had numerous clashes in the back alleys of NATION’s cities due to the government’s steadfast anti-casino stance.
Taxes +1

3. “There is a solution to this problem,” says Native @@NAME@@ite chief Dances-With-@@ANIMAL@@s. “You could let us front the casinos as payback for stealing our land, and we’ll enforce age limits and pay some tax on the income these casinos generate. Just think of the jobs it could create for us, and the boost to the economy!”
The Results: gambling addicts regularly lose their families’ nest eggs at Native Nationite casinos.
Economy +3
Taxes -1

—————————————————————————–

#112: Put The Phone Down On Cold Calling? [Frigben; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
A growing group of @@NAME@@’s citizens are battling for an end to unrequested solicitations from salesmen.

The Debate
1. “This has to stop,” says mild-mannered parent @@RANDOMNAME@@. “My family can’t even have dinner without being interrupted at least five times by telemarketers or door-to-door salesmen! My privacy is being invaded! The government ought to ban all forms of unrequested solicitations from salespeople. The sanity of the populace is at stake here!”
The Result: a ban on unsolicited cold calling in all forms is in effect.
Civil Rights +7
Economy -3

2. “This must be a joke,” retorts insurance sales solicitor @@RANDOMNAME@@, in between cold calls. “Telemarketing and door-to-door sales are some of the most effective methods of increasing revenues. Banning them would be a huge blow to business, and put thousands of workers out of their jobs! Let’s face the facts – @@NAME@@ needs an economy, and banning cold calls isn’t the best of ways to improve it! One way you could improve it would be to, say, give us some government funds. For the sake of @@NAME@@, of course.”
The Result: door-to-door salesmen are frequently beaten up by ‘vigilantes’.
Economy +10

—————————————————————————–
#114: Wipe Out Graffiti? [Gelvanie; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
Citizens all over @@NAME@@ have been petitioning for firmer action on public graffiti.

The Debate
1. “It’s a disgrace!” declares @@RANDOMNAME@@, middle class and proud of it. “I can’t even go downtown without seeing these hideous eyesores debasing the streets! We need to arrest the scumbags at the root of this, lock them up, and teach them a jolly good lesson! More policemen on the beat should do the ticket, even if it does require a slight augmentation in taxes!”
The Result: graffiti artists spend lengthy periods of time in jail.
Civil Rights -2

2. “I don’t see what’s so bad,” comments @@RANDOMNAME@@, a famous art critic. “This is urban art at its finest. It’s vibrant, colourful, and simply reeks of culture! Just look at the form displayed in this string of racist expletives! Wonderful. Simply wonderful. I think we should really be encouraging these budding Rembrandts, not putting them down! I say we legalise it, in the name of culture!”
The Result: graffiti graces every city’s streets.
Civil Rights +1

—————————————————————————–
#115: @@NAME@@’s Schoolchildren Not Learning The Lingua Franca [Travis Dominicus; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
After a recent national survey revealed that almost three-quarters of the population only know the primary language of @@NAME@@, there have been rising calls for the government to take action.

The Debate
1. “Fluency in foreign languages is imperative to education,” says Professor @@RANDOMNAME@@ of @@NAME@@ University. “Learning a new tongue not only gives a child a practical, marketable skill, but also encourages compassion and understanding of foreign cultures. With so many nations in the world, I do insist that we increase government funding in these areas and make it a compulsory part of the curriculum. As we say in Ancient Maxtopian: froggug sederty bungo-bungo!”
The Results: citizens are expected to be proficient in at least five languages.
Taxes +1

2. “To be frank, the need for outsiders’ speak doesn’t appeal to me in the slightest!” claims @@RANDOMNAME@@, a fierce patriot. “Making our children learn these languages is an affront to the basic civil rights of @@NAME@@! What’s more, this will encourage those damn foreigners to come here and take our jobs! I for one, will not stand for it! We can drop that area of education; it’ll give us tax payers a bit of a breather for once. I’ve always said that we don’t need any others but our own!”
The Results: all streets are privately owned toll roads.
Economy +4
Taxes -2

—————————————————————————–
#116: Soda Sales Hits New ‘High’ [Foe Hammer; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
After waning sales, the well-established soda company ‘Eckie-Ecola’ has appealed to the government for the right to use powerful mind-altering drugs in their products.

The Debate
1. “It’ll be great,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the CEO of Eckie-Ecola. “Nice ‘n’ happy floating feelings all in a can, and all for just one @@CURRENCY@@! It’s not the healthiest drink I admit, but what people want to do with their bodies is their own business. If you ban this beverage, you’re only denying the citizens of their right to be exposed to the true hallucenogenic experience!”
The Result: ‘Mountain Doobie’ is widely regarded as the nation’s favourite drink.
Economy +5
Corruption +1
Eco-Friendlines -1
Health -2
Industry: Beverage Sales +1
Lifespan -2
Obesity +6
Toxicity +4

2. “This can’t go ahead,” argues @@RANDOMNAME@@, a nurse at one of @@NAME@@’s hospitals. “Drugs are, and always will be, one of the greatest threats to the nation’s physical and mental health! My job’s hard enough as it is without having the wards overrun by patients who were stupid enough to drink the damned stuff. The distribution of drugs must be strictly controlled by the government and kept for medicinal uses.”
The Result: drug distribution is tightly controlled by the government.
Civil Rights -5
Economy -2
Taxes +1
Business Subsidization -3
Ideological Radicality +1
Health +1
Lifespan +1
Law Enforcement +3
Pacifism +2
Recreational Drug Use -9
Safety +1

3. “If you ask me,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, from behind a cloud of smoke. “We should just let everyone have drugs for free! If the government legalised and subsidised all these ‘bad’ drugs and gave ’em out to everyone, all our problems would be solved! There’d be no more drug traffickers, or thugs robbing old ladies to feed their addictions! ‘Course there’d be a bit of a detrimental effect healthwise and to the drug industries, but the beauty of it all is that everyone will be too doped up to care!”
The Result: reports of attacks by bright purple sixty-foot high spiders have recently shot up.
Civil Rights +6
Taxes +1
Employment -3
Health -1
Influence -1
Law Enforcement -4
Recreational Drug Use +48
Safety -2
Safety From Crime -3
Toxicity +5

—————————————————————————–
#117: Stop The Suits, Say Surgeons [Ravenspire; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
Recently, medical insurance premiums across the nation have been skyrocketing following several highly-publicised medical-malpractice lawsuits, making it even costlier than ever to get treatment. Doctors are asking the government to step in.

The Debate
1. “These lawsuits are driving up the price of medical insurance,” complains Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I’m losing customers – patients, I mean – and it’s becoming increasingly difficult for doctors like me to do our jobs without worrying about being bankrupted by some kid who didn’t like the hospital food. Everyone makes mistakes. Look at politicians, they make them all the time and do they get fired? No. We must outlaw the medical-malpractice lawsuits undermining our healthcare system!”
The Result: appendix transplant figures have recently doubled.
Civil Rights -6
Economy -3
Taxes -1

2. “All that these doctors are interested in is saving their own necks,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of ‘I Can’t Believe It’s A Law Firm!’. “They were negligent in the course of their work and are unwilling to pay the price. I mean, how do you perform a heart transplant on the wrong guy unless you’re not paying attention? I for one think that our citizens deserve better from the healthcare service, and if doctors cause damage, they should pay for it. It’s that simple. If some decent doctors get caught up in it, then it’s surely their own fault for not being careful enough?”
The Result: medical lawsuits are out of control.
Civil Rights +3
Economy +8
Taxes +1

3. “The problem is capitalism,” insists @@RANDOMNAME@@, while trying to burn a @@CURRENCY@@ with a lighter. “The doctors are only trying to help their patients, and those class traitors at the insurance industry are only trying to make a profit out of people’s misery on those rare occasions when things go wrong. I say we outlaw the insurance industry and then the good doctors will be safe while the bad ones go out of business. Everyone wins! Apart from the insurance people, I guess.”
The Result: the insurance industry is outlawed.
Economy -8
Taxes -1

4. “The problem certainly is capitalism,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a famed socialist. “But outlawing the insurance industry will not solve the main problem: the healthcare system itself! It’s disgusting! I’ve seen paramedics check wallets before injuries! We must introduce a national health service and put some healthy investment into medical colleges, hospitals, and the likes. Then we’ll have an over-abundance of competent doctors! The insurance industry won’t be able to raise a finger to it and the citizens won’t have to pay for treatment. Except through tax, of course.”
The Result: the study of medicine is popular throughout NATION.
Economy -7
Taxes +3

—————————————————————————–
#118: Need For Speed? [Atlantic Rim; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
After watching the movie ‘The Fast and the Belligerent’, boyracers from all over @@NAME@@ have been petitioning for the abolition of speed limits.
The Debate
1. “Today’s cars are safer at high speeds than ever before,” argues @@RANDOMNAME@@, editor of Sports Car Monthly. “And long-distance commuters are tired of spending hours on the road just to get to the next city. Abolishing the speed limit would be great for the economy too! People would be more likely to go out and buy cars if they thought they’d be able to use them properly. It seems like such a shame to be puttering along at the speed limit in a magnificent car like the 450HP twin-turbo @@ANIMAL@@ SX/T-7700 you know.”
The Result: the roads are notorious throughout the region for their peril.
Civil Rights +8
Taxes -1

2. “Are you crazy?” cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, a road-accident victim. “We need lower speed limits on automobiles, not higher. You might as well enforce mandatory blindfolds on the road too, it’ll come to the same conclusion! People’s lives are at stake here! If people were made to drive at, say, no faster than fifty kilometres per hour, I would feel a lot happier walking the streets. Besides, if it takes a long time to get places via car then people might begin using mass transit for once.”
The Result: the average commuter spends four hours a day driving to and from work.
Civil Rights -6

3. “I think the current speed limits are fine, but we need better enforcement,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, the most feared traffic warden in @@NAME@@. “If we required GPS tracking devices in all vehicles, we’d ticket every single speeder, no problem. In addition, we could monitor the movements of criminals and other suspicious individuals, and vastly reduce the risk of crime, terrorism, and other subversive activity. Some say that’s an invasion of privacy, but if you’ve done nothing wrong what’s there to fear?”
The Result: motorists’ locations are constantly tracked by intelligence and law enforcement agencies.
Taxes +1
Safety +2

—————————————————————————–
#119: Watershed Down? [New Cyprus; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
An anonymous society of ‘cinematic aficionados’ have brought the debate over the proposed disposal of the watershed, the hour after which adult material is allowed to be shown on television, to your attention.

The Debate
1. “We don’t need a watershed!” scoffs ‘romantic-movie’ buff, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I don’t see why I should wait ’til way past midnight to watch my preferred film genre. It’s high time that parents stopped treating their children like… well, children! If you sugar-coat these kids’ lives, they’ll just end up seeing everything through rose-tinted glasses – and we can’t have a country filled with spoilt brats now, can we?”
The Result: programmes of questionable content are shown at peak-hours.
Civil Rights +4
Economy +1

2. “This is an endorsement of bad taste if ever I saw it,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a child-care worker. “It’s just wrong to subject children to graphic violence and nudity on afternoon television like this: who knows what it might possess them to do? We’ve all heard stories of kids who have seen some film where someone jumped off a cliff and then gone off to have a shot themselves. We must ban all violent and salacious material from our TV screens. If only to protect the innocence of our progeny!”
The Result: Rupert ANIMAL is considered to be the most risqué TV programme in NATION.
Civil Rights -2
Economy -4

—————————————————————————–
#120: Two Parties For Too Long? [Ren Yi; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
Representatives of several minor political parties have joined their voices to object to stiff ballot access requirements.

The Debate
1. “Two-party politics is squeezing the life out of democracy in @@NAME@@,” laments @@RANDOMNAME@@, leader of the Pragmatic Radical Party. “The Liberal Conservatives and Progressive Traditionalists have a monopoly on public policy – or duopoly, whatever you want to call it. The point is that there’s hardly any difference between them, and their chokehold on the electoral process lets hacks and crooks stay in office forever. Ballot access rules must be loosened so we can give the voters a truly democratic choice.”
The Result: ten-year-olds regularly found their own political parties.
Political Freedoms +7
Taxes +5

2. “People are afraid to support ‘third’ parties because they’re afraid of seeing the ‘bad guys’ get elected,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a ballot stastician. “But if we changed the system to allow preferential voting, where you can have your votes divvied up among your other candidates if your favourite doesn’t recieve a certain number of votes, then that wouldn’t be a problem. Then you could let as many parties as you wanted into the game. Deserving candidates wouldn’t be harmed – they’d win! Maybe a few radicals would get through, but that just proves what a great system it is!”
The Result: the NATION Mental Asylum Party have recently won seats in parliament.
Political Freedoms +10
Taxes +3

3. “What ever happened to ‘one man, one vote’?” asks @@RANDOMNAME@@, chairperson of the Liberal Conservative National Committee. “Changing the rules will just let all sorts of crackpots clog up the ballot and overwhelm voters with names they don’t recognise – this will draw attention and support away from legitimate candidates! How do you expect the nation to function properly if the government doesn’t have public support? Oh, and by the way, the Liberal Conservative Party presents a VERY clear alternative to the destructive agenda of the Progressive Traditionalists, and I’ll wallop anyone who says otherwise.”
The Result: citizens are known to cast their votes by flipping a CURRENCY.
Political Freedoms -5
Taxes -3

4. “Opposition parties are such a bother,” muses @@RANDOMNAME@@, your chief of staff. “If we allowed as many of them to be politicians as those fools in the Pragmatic Radical Party want, it would be very hard on the tax payers – and our own position in power. If we re-wrote the election rules so that a party had to reapply for recognition every time it failed to win a certain number of votes, we could knock our opposition out of the ring for good! Hey, the voters have spoken, and they asked for us. I think that just about settles it, don’t you?”
The Result: an enfeebled opposition party spends most of its time simply trying to stay on the ballot.
Political Freedoms -24
Taxes -3

Issues 081-100

#081: Close Encounters Of The Sci-fi Kind? [Spyr; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
A recent, well-publicized UFO sighting over rural areas of @@NAME@@ has turned people’s attention to the skies, and what… or who… might be up there.

The Debate
1. “This event proves one thing: there are other life-forms out there,” says eccentric astronomer @@RANDOMNAME@@, “All we have to do is find them! What is the price of a few hundred Radio Telescopes compared to the benefit of living in peace and harmony with our brethren of the stars?”
The Result: UFO sightings are listed daily in the morning news.
Economy +4
Taxes +1

2. “Spies! It’s gotta be spies! A few planes or satellites from our enemies or ‘allies’ in our region,” rages General @@RANDOMNAME@@, head of @@NAME@@’s military, “The only way to keep those snoops out of our airspace is to patrol the streets ‘n skies, and shoot ’em down! Even if they are some sort of little green aliens, a couple of SAM batteries and a few flak cannons’ll keep ’em from abducting our @@ANIMAL@@s.”
The Result: birds and children’s kites are regularly brought down by anti-aircraft fire.
Economy +1

3. “Extraterrestrial lifeforms? Alien invaders? I don’t know why we even have to listen to such idiocy!” complains prize-winning physicist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “In my opinion, the idea of ‘aliens’ on another planet is highly unlikely, and even if they did exist, getting from there to here is technically impossible! I say we forget this nonsense and stop spending our tax @@CURRENCY@@s on it. Leave this sort of foolishness to the people who attend those ‘trekkie’ conventions.”
The Result: X-Files ratings have hit an all-time low.
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————–
#083: High-Speed Monorail Service Promises Connections [Baudrillard; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Vroom-A-Zoom-Zoom (VAZZ), a consortium of weird-looking hippies and yuppie roller coaster aficionados, has developed plans for a high-speed monorail service for @@NAME@@ to help counter and relieve problems brought about by banning cars.

The Debate
1. “This is great,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, devout anti-spending advocate. “You know what’ll happen? The government will invest huge sums of money in a service no one will use. I suggest nipping it in the bud… and cutting back government spending across the board while you’re at it.”
The Result: government spending has hit an all-time low.
Economy +2
Taxes -6

2. “I disagree,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@ of Vroom-A-Zoom-Zoom Ltd. “If people are worried about the costs, why not let the monorail service be a private company? That way, it will have to compete with other industries and make a profit. And don’t forget that’ll bring in more tax revenue. Of course, that would make fares too pricey for a lot of people, but the rich would probably use it a lot!”
The Result: only the wealthy can afford monorail fares.
Economy +7
Taxes -1

3. “I really disagree,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an unwashed denizen standing in the middle of Noh Weir, population 200, on the outskirts of @@NAME@@. “The state must run the monorail service, otherwise it’s useless. What a monorail system should do is connect both large and small cities, and the only way to do that is for the government to run the rails, using the profits from the larger cities to subsidize the routes for smaller ones.”
The Result: a vast monorail network carries people all over the country.
Taxes +2
—————————————————————————–
#084: Compulsory Gun Ownership? [Tristram; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
This weekend, a citizen’s group calling itself Gun Owners of @@NAME@@ has petitioned Congress with a controversial bill making gun ownership compulsory.

The Debate
1. “This is a very important step to securing the rights and lives of our families and controlling the government,” urges noted gun ownership proponent @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Not only would it significantly decrease crime, but it would also effectively stop government tyranny in its tracks. Of course, this also means that every wacko and their cousin will have a gun, but don’t worry, you’ll have a gun to defend yourself from them, so it will all work out.”
The Result: gun ownership is compulsory.
Civil Rights -5
Taxes +1

2. “While the Gun Owners of @@NAME@@ have the safety and security of our people in mind, it would simply be impractical to enforce,” comments Police Chief @@RANDOMNAME@@. “A better option would be to legalize, and encourage use of, concealed carry laws, which would allow responsible citizens to keep firearms with them at all times, on their person, to kill any wacko or their cousin who they think is threatening them.”
The Result: citizens are permitted to carry concealed handguns.
Civil Rights +3

3. “Compulsory gun ownership?! Concealed carry?! Are these fools nuts?!” rants an enraged Million Mummy March activist. “We don’t need any of these things! What we need is complete gun registration, so that the government can track down dangerous people, like those people who possess unregistered weapons.”
The Result: all guns must be registered.
Civil Rights -2
Taxes +2
Eco-Friendliness +2
Defense Forces +2
Law Enforcement +2
Pacifism +36
Public Healthcare +2
Safety -4
Safety from Crime -2
Social Conservatism +1
Weaponization -23
Youth Rebelliousness -1
—————————————————————————–
#085: Illegal File-Sharing Flares [Frigben; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
A surprise raid conducted on ISPs over the last week in @@NAME@@ shows that more than 30% of all Internet data transfer in @@NAME@@ at one time or another is used by illegal file-shares to illegally distribute files, most notably songs.

The Debate
1. “What we need to do is hack their computers and format their hard drives,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, recording industry representative. “People need to be taught to not mess with the law. This is theft, pure and simple. And they’re not only halving our revenue to tune of billions of @@CURRENCY@@s, but you are also stealing a few hundredths of a @@CURRENCY@@ from the artist for every song they steal. THINK OF THE STARVING ARTISTS!”
The Result: a cyber-war between file sharers and the music industry formats hard drives across the country.

2. “Yo, dude, like, don’t be hatin’ man,” says teenager @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We’re like, going to change the whole structure of our society. Everything should be like, publicly available to, like, everybody, dude. Copyrights are so, like, uncool man and we need to get rid of them. That’d be totally radical, and cool as well.”
The Result: copyright laws have been abolished.
Civil Rights +6
Economy -5

3. “Yo, dang, blizzity blang, yo, this ain’t, right, yo,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, famous rapper with three platinum albums. “Dang, yo, we dang need to copy-protect my dang CDs, yo. That dang playability life dang decreases, yo, but it’s the only way to stop this, dang, yo.”
The Result: CDs are regularly copy-protected.
Economy -2
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————–
#087: Burn! Burn Everything! [PRC China; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
A recent anti-government rally by highly disgruntled teens has brought a previously minor issue to the fore: should people be permitted to burn @@NAME@@’s flag, or should it be a crime?

The Debate
1. “We should be able to burn the flag as a sign of protest. I say ignore those crazy red-blooded fanatics who won’t let us! After all it’s because we are a tolerant nation that we should allow it!” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, civil rights activist, while accidentally immolating many nearby protesters.
The Result: crowds of flag-burning protesters tend to accidentally become crowds of burning protesters.
Taxes -1

2. “Burning should be allowed for everything! Down with the pig cops and their repressive regime!” says well-known anarchist and arsonist @@RANDOMNAME@@, from the comfy and non-flammable confines of a prison cell. “Burn! Burn burn burn! Everything! Kyahahaha!”
The Result: the capital of NATION has burned to the ground and caused riots throughout the country.
Political Freedoms +20
Taxes -4
3. “These barbarians are suggesting burning the flag of our glorious nation as if it were a piece of scrap cloth! First it’s burning the flag, and before you know it, it’s rebellion and anarchy!” @@RANDOMNAME@@ scowls. “Flag burning should be punishable by jail terms and a good flogging!”
The Result: people caught mistreating NATION’s flag generally wind up in a great deal of pain.
Political Freedoms -4
Authoritarianism +0.018
Averageness +96
Corruption -7
Ideological Radicality -2
Law Enforcement +1
Pacifism -5
Rudeness -0.7
Safety -7
Weaponization +2

—————————————————————————–
#088: Cannibals Demand To Taste What @@NAME@@ Has To Offer [Sovereign Discord; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
A coalition of tribalists, health experts, and civil rights proponents have recently suggested legalizing cannibalism for consumers of willing would-be meals.

The Debate
1. “I see absolutely no problem with people digging into each other at dinnertime, so long as everyone is willing,” @@RANDOMNAME@@, the editor of the monthly magazine ‘To Serve Man’, quips, “Not only does it solve hunger problems and create jobs, but it also adds variety to @@NAME@@’s sometimes dull palette.”
The Result: murder rates are on the rise as the popularity of soylent products grows.
Civil Rights +7

2. Civil rights leader @@RANDOMNAME@@ came out publicly for moderate pro-cannibalism legislation, commenting, “While it may strike some as a crude, even evil practice, our ancestors have practiced cannibalism for years. If we create a government organization to strictly regulate and grade all human meat prior to its arrival on the market, we can ensure that respect for diversity is maintained while health concerns are also allayed. And instead of killing average people, why not make being turned into snack foods a post-mortem option? Like donating your body to science!”
The Result: soylent products are an expensive commodity due to a lack of volunteers.
Civil Rights +4

3. “You’re all absolutely out of your minds!” exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, head of @@NAME@@’s largest health-food manufacturer. “It’s immoral, it’s unhealthy, and it’s disgusting. Not only are these so-called ‘dietary rights’ activists leading us down a dark path of sin, but right into a marketplace with yet another product that’s almost as bad as beef!”
The Result: there has been a series of riots between local cannibals and health food advocates.
Civil Rights -8

—————————————————————————–
#089: “Don’t Dam Our Rivers, Damnit!” Say Protesters [Frigben; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
A group of Greenpeace protesters have called for an end to a government proposal to begin damming rivers in @@NAME@@ to increase water supplies and generate power.

The Debate
1. “Don’t build dams!” shouts protestor @@RANDOMNAME@@ through a microphone heavily afflicted with feedback. “Do you know how many fish die in other dams in our region each year? Have you heard of the adverse effects building a dam has on the surrounding environment? Dam up this flood of dams, damn it!”
The Result: flash floods that dams could have controlled regularly ravage small towns in mountain valleys.

2. “Think before you open your mouth,” says engineer @@RANDOMNAME@@. “While @@NAME@@ may have to pay the price in animal diversity, as well as adverse effects on the environment, do we really want fossil-fuel based plants polluting @@NAME@@? If you use your common sense, I think you’ll find that damming some rivers would be a good idea. Plus, think of how much the economy would benefit from all the jobs these projects would create.”
The Result: scenic mountain valleys are flooded with water as damming projects get underway.
Employment +2

—————————————————————————–
#090: Organic Outburst [Dark_Zephyr; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
After a recent left-wing broadsheet exposé of agricultural practices, an outburst of public paranoia has stirred up the organic foods debate.

The Debate
1. “I just can’t stomach it any more,” rants concerned parent @@RANDOMNAME@@. “My children’s future is being put at risk by irresponsible corporate practices. We must outlaw the use of pesticides and additives by farmers and food producers.”
The Result: all-natural foods are becoming a major fad.
Sector: Agriculture -1

2. “I’ve heard enough of this treehugging, lefty nonsense,” argues corporate spokesman @@RANDOMNAME@@. “The agricultural industry needs to use the most advanced technology available, it’s the only way to keep @@NAME@@ competitive in food production. Besides, the studies we have commissioned prove that only a very small number of child deaths are due to our products, and surely that’s an acceptable rate in the name of progress?”
The Result: a survey of the nation’s rivers and children has shown that pesticide levels are at an all-time regional high.

3. “Stop torturing Mother Earth!” yells outraged environmental extremist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Are we prepared to sacrifice our planet and our souls for the sake of a few extra @@CURRENCY@@s? If we hope to live in harmony with the environment that nurtures and protects us, we must ban all industries that pollute our world. Let us return to the trees, my brothers!”
The Result: people are moving into treehouses in record numbers.
Economy -16

—————————————————————————–
#091: Sacramental Tax Time? [Rational Self Interest; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Secularists have been urging the government to impose an income tax on religious organizations in @@NAME@@ for some time now, and the issue has finally made its way to the upper levels of the government.

The Debate
1. Self-appointed civil rights spokesman @@RANDOMNAME@@ declares, “Churches are business organizations with a large income. It’s unfair that they don’t have to pay the same taxes that everyone else does. If they really do spend any money on charity, let them write it off as a deduction just like corporations do. There’s no reason that so-called clergy should be chauffeured around in limos tax-free, when we desperately need funds for public works.”
The Result: religious organizations are being forced to leave the country or pay income taxes like everybody else.
Civil Rights -2
Godlessness +2

2. “Freedom of conscience is foremost among liberties,” says Reverend @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Churches have been exempted from taxation because it is wrong for the government to infringe on the right of people to worship as they please, and that includes charging them for the right to worship. Besides, churches are non-profit organizations that put all their funds back into the community.”
The Result: televangelists flaunt their expensive cars when they attend charity events.
Civil Rights +3
Taxes -1

3. The Honorable @@RANDOMNAME@@, Minister of Minding Other People’s Business, has an idea: “This religion thing is such a great racket, why don’t we make it a government monopoly? We’ll ban all religions except the Church of @@NAME@@, and make attendance and donations compulsory. I’ll start writing the Holy Scriptures right away!”
The Result: membership in the state-owned Church of NATION is mandatory and all other faith organisations are banned.
Civil Rights -6
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————–

#093: Affirmative Action in @@NAME@@? [The Orange Freestate; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
After a recent high-profile case of a minority student being refused admission to a traditional, prestigious college, civil rights activists, conservatives, and teachers are up in arms about affirmative action and ethnic equality in education.

The Debate
1. “This is just another attempt to discriminate against people of color,” declares civil-rights activist, former TV commentator and unabashed publicity speaker @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If people are disadvantaged in their upbringing then they should be given an ‘equal’ chance to succeed in college.”
The Result: colleges adhere to rigid ethnic quotas for admissions.

2. “The affirmative action programs aren’t necessary at all,” rejoins conservative speaker and hair care product salesman @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If you really want to treat everyone equally, as you claim, how can you support special treatment for a few so-called minority groups? Besides, it would cost even more money to enforce.”
The Result: ethnic minorities are often refused admission to some of the nation’s best schools.
Taxes -1

3. “I think you are both looney,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, professor of liberal arts at @@NAME@@ National University. “All education should be open to everyone regardless of their grades in high school, economic status or academic prowess. Free college education should be available to every citizen of @@NAME@@, no matter what the cost!”
The Result: NATION’s educational system is the envy of many and regarded as a pinnacle of academic achievement.
Economy +1
Taxes +2

—————————————————————————-

#094: Computer Users Fed Up With Heaps of Spam! [Bored Yawning; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
A survey citing a tremendous increase in unsolicited emails has added fire to the subject of what many view as a scourge of the Internet.

The Debate
1. “The spam problem is out of control,” states anti-spam advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I get at least fifty spam e-mails a day. That isn’t even counting the spam people are posting to my newsgroup and to my messageboard. This junk is a waste of time in that I have to delete it and a waste of my money in that I have to buy anti-spam programs-which hardly work anyway. People get swindled by this stuff – it should be a crime, just like regular fraud.”
The Results: the government spends millions of CURRENCYs every year prosecuting spammers.
Civil Rights -1
Taxes +2

2. “A ban on all spam is a restriction on our freedom of speech and on the freedom of the press!” screams @@RANDOMNAME@@ president of Citizens for Internet Freedom. “What is the government to say what is and isn’t commercial spam? Could they haul charity representatives off to jail for seeking donations? Could they jail politicians for using e-mail to try and gain votes? Could they arrest me if I accidentally send my erotic novel-in-progress to the wrong address? Seriously, spamming is a subjective offense and as such should not be considered a crime.”
The Results: computer users are buried daily in thousands of unsolicited emails.

3. “Both sides are wrong,” grumbles government paper-pusher @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Spam is definitely a problem, yet so is the restriction on freedoms which some draconian anti-spam codes would impose. I propose a ban on overtly fraudulent spam, and a tax on more legitimate businesses that rely on spam as an advertising method, and a strict legal definition of spam that would ensure no innocent person was prosecuted or taxed.”
The Results: the government is making attempts at curtailing the flood of spam emails with little progress.
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————-
#095: Painful Prices Paid At The Pump [Aljerfribish; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Commuters are complaining about the ongoing rise in gas prices, causing a massive debate in the government about what should be done.

The Debate
1. “Who cares about a few trees?” says oil executive @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Gas prices are six @@CURRENCY@@s per gallon, and rising! There is lots of oil to be found in areas currently protected as parks! Solving our energy needs is more important than conserving the environment. Just give us permission to go in there and start drilling, and gas prices will plummet!”
The Result: pristine wilderness has been trashed in the quest for cheaper oil.
Taxes -1
Eco-Frienlines -1
Lifespan -1
Toxicity +6
Weather -3

2. “There are other ways to recover from the fossil fuel crisis besides ruining forests,” says environmental activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We shouldn’t just take the short way out and drill here. I suggest spending more money on public transportation systems and encouraging people to carpool – if people weren’t so reliant on fossil fuel powered cars, we wouldn’t be in this situation in the first place, and if we start using less oil, the price will drop with the demand.”
The Result: the government is spending millions on renovating the public transportation system.
Taxes +2
Eco-Friendliness +1
Public Transportation +2
Health +1
Toxicity -6
Tourism +1
Weather +4

—————————————————————————–
#099: We Need Cash, Sharpish, Say Librarians [Os Cosia; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
Ailing libraries have appealed to the government for a much-needed injection of funds.

The Debate
1. “Our libraries are in a dreadful state,” says distressed librarian, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “This year we had to cancel our subscription to ‘Playboy’ and over half of our shelves are stacked with pamphlets from the Pizzeria across the road. We need more books and better standards. If there were more perks in this job then maybe we’d get some decent employees! If it needs a whole lot of government funds to pay for it all then so be it!”
The Result: libraries are now installed with jacuzzis and mini-bars.
Taxes +1

2. “Now hold it right there!” says manager of the local MEGA-BOOKS store, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I employ twenty-four people and we are dependent upon people paying us money to buy books, magazines and newspapers from my store. How can you even think about giving our tax @@CURRENCY@@s to these people so they can put us out of business? ‘Course poor people won’t be able to afford our wares but they’d only use them for fires or somethin’. Let our libraries die.”
The Result: books are considered luxuries only available to the incredibly wealthy.
Taxes -2

3. “I’m all for giving our libraries more money,” says Education Minister, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “But we certainly shouldn’t just let them spend it however they please. We need an elected board to oversee all purchases and acquisitions made by our library system, promoting educational literature and keeping out smut. That way we can keep nudity out of the hands of children. We can make sure none of those political satires and newspapers that insult our government affect the weak-minded amongst us too. Then our libraries will be something to be proud of.”
The Result: all writing must pass a censorship board before being allowed on the shelves.

4. “Great Scot! I’ve got it!” exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, your science advisor. “Why do we need these brick and mortar buildings anyway? Let’s just scan all these books, newspapers and magazines onto the internet and then we can fire all those expensive librarians with their pensions and healthcare benefits. Think of the money we’d save if we didn’t have to print everything! Sure it’ll be tough on the librarians and those with no computers but hey, this is the future and they are the past.”
The Result: libraries are bulldozed to make way for internet cafés.
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————–
#100: Road Rage Rampage [SatanSpermSpawn; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Due to the ever-increasing traffic on @@NAME@@’s highways, commuter tempers are flaring, leading to an increase in road rage related accidents. A recent case in which a very impatient driver attacked and seriously injured a slow driver has brought the subject rapidly to the highest levels of the government.

The Debate
1. “The problem is that our highway system is sorely in need of an overhaul,” claims social commentator @@RANDOMNAME@@. “@@NAME@@’s highways were constructed with a far smaller number of cars in mind, and we’ve exceeded that traffic load by a substantial amount, resulting in traffic jams. Traffic jams lead to impatience, impatience leads to anger, anger leads to road rage, and road rage leads to violence. We need to expand the freeway system by adding more lanes to relieve the traffic congestion.”
The Result: traffic jams are a common sight due to construction work from a massive overhaul of the nation’s freeways.

2. “You add new lanes, even MORE people will drive, putting us right back at square one!” counters @@RANDOMNAME@@ of @@NAME@@’s public transportation committee. “Instead of throwing tons of money at a short-term solution, why not spend it on improving bus and rail service and encouraging carpooling? Oh, and get more highway patrol officers to crack down on these violent drivers who pose safety threats to the rest of us.”
The Result: the government has started a campaign to crack down on road rage and encourage alternate means of commuting.

3. “*BLEEP!* that *BLEEP!*” Catherine Gratwick yells at the top of her lungs from the window of her very large pickup truck with a gun rack mounted in the rear window. “The government should just *BLEEP!*ing stay out of our daily *BLEEP!*ing drive! They ought to let us *BLEEP!*ing rushed businesspeople go about our daily *BLEEP!*ing business, no matter what *BLEEP!*ing measures we have to take to get to *BLEEP!*ing work on time!”
The Result: it’s a common sight to see angry commuters with grenade launchers mounted on their vehicles.
Civil Rights +1
Taxes -2
Averageness -32
Compassion -2
Happiness +1
Ideological Radicality +1
Niceness -2
Nudity +4
Pacifism -6
Political Apathy +2
Recreational Drug Use +2
Rudeness +2
Rudeness -9
Safety from Crime -3
Social Conservatism -2
Toxicity +9
Weaponization +27
Weather -2

Issues 061-080

#061: Should The Government Grant Estates And Titles Of Nobility? [Leptonia; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
A peculiar confederacy of small-government advocates, regular attendees at @@NAME@@’s annual Medieval Faire, and the super rich have demanded that the government grant estates and confer titles of nobility upon certain influential persons.

The Debate
1. “Of course I should be appointed as the Duke of @@CAPITAL@@,” says multi-billionaire @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Not only would it be an apt reward for my contributions to @@NAME@@, but the citizens who become landed serfs on my estate would work harder than they ever have in all their lives.” Adds small-government advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@, “Government would at last return to the local level, close to the people and the land to which they would be bound for life.”
The Result: society and government have been organized according to a feudal hierarchy.
Civil Rights -2
Political Freedoms -25
Taxes -1
Lifespan -1
Corruption +2

2. “I can’t believe I’m hearing this,” exclaims noted civil rights advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Those who are behind this espouse a system that grants inordinate amounts of institutional power to the rich and ensures that no one will be able to climb the social ladder. Everyone in society must be granted an equal opportunity to succeed or fail. Say ‘no’ to a nobility!”
The Result: citizens are allowed to rise or fall based on their own merits.
Economy +10
Taxes +1

3. “I think both of the other parties are taking this issue to the extreme,” argues a learned elderly gentleman resting on a park bench. “All that’s being advocated is giving those who have contributed to their nation a ceremonial title and a bit of land. Besides,” he adds, “the government can tax their estate.”
The Result: notable individuals are granted land and titles.
Taxes +1

4. “A good day to thee, milord,” counters @@RANDOMNAME@@, an amateur Medieval Faire actor dressed in period costume, “I would suggest that thou hasten thyself to spectate at the jousting competition this forenoon. Aye, quite a bout we have arrayed for thee this day. However, the whole affair could be much grander if only we received a few more gold crownes from the government. Aye, ‘twould be a grand tourney of knightly skill and courage indeed!”
The Result: NATION’s Medieval Faire is renowned as one of the best in the region.
Economy +5
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————–
#062: Oh, The Angst! [Uni Students; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
In response to rising rates of depression related suicides, mental health groups have called for government funding to help support treatment programs, citing various surveys that indicate psychological disorders are often an overlooked problem.

The Debate
1. “Although it is often dismissed as an irrelevant complaint, depression is a real disease; it isn’t just ‘all in your head’,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, depression sufferer. “Depression has significant effects on groups and individuals, especially amongst teenagers. Every day, more and more people commit suicide because of this disease, but this could all be stopped if this country had a decent level of funding for support and public awareness programs.”
The Result: citizens are encouraged to report friends, family members or co-workers who seem depressed to the government for “counselling”.
Public Healthcare +1

2. “Screw them,” @@RANDOMNAME@@, talkback radio host, stated yesterday. “Depression isn’t a disease, it’s just another example of today’s youth finding something to complain about. Life’s never been better. In fact, just yesterday, I bought my fourth BMW. And even if it is as serious as the bleeding hearts claim, then I say we leave it and cut some of the funding being wasted on these head cases. If a few whiners jump off a bridge, it’ll be good for the genepool. Natural selection, my friends. It’s a great thing.”
The Result: psychological disorders are a taboo subject.
Happiness -2

3. “Actually, a lot of depression cases in teens are related to school and all the stress and pressure young people are under to succeed. A greater effort to correct the problem of depression should start there, with more funding so that schools can provide better counseling programs.” Comments Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@, author of the book “Tomato Soup for the Soul”. “That way teens who are depressed can get help even if their parents can’t or won’t take them to see a psychologist.”
The Result: schools have extensive counseling programs for troubled students.
Taxes +1
Averageness +0.025
Health +2
Public Healthcare +1
Happiness +1
Weather +5

—————————————————————————–
#069: Power Problems Need Bright Solution [Plumbumia; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
The oldest power station in @@NAME@@ suffered a catastrophic failure last night, plunging a third of @@NAME@@’s national power supply grid into darkness. There is no debate that it needs to be replaced, but the question is with what?

The Debate
1. “The solution is clear,” says environmental activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Wind turbines and solar power stations are the cleanest there are. We must switch power production to forms of renewable energy, that will never run out. The only minor problems are that wind farms will take up a great deal of space and of course we can’t exactly rely on the weather. It isn’t as though we control it. But think of how much healthier people will be without all that pollution!”
The Result: prime real estate is devoted to wind farms and solar energy generators.
Eco-Friendliness +2
Environmental Beauty +8
Lifespan +1
Tourism +3
Toxicity -5
Weather +4

2. “Wind power? Solar collectors? Bah! Have you ever wondered when the least amount of strain is placed on the national grid? WHEN THE SUN IS SHINING!” exclaims Southern @@NAME@@ Electra official @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We need power under our control, and cheaply. Coal has been the cheapest and most abundant power source for ages. We don’t need this airy fairy wind malarky when we have cheap and reliable power available for all. True, pollution will be a bit on the heavy side but I’m sure that’s only a minor problem, with how well funded our health system is!”
The Result: vile black smog from coal power plants has enveloped several major urban centres.
Environmental Beauty -15
Lifespan -2
Toxicity +11
Weather -7

3. “Now the way I see it is that it’s either green, expensive, and sprawling; or compact, polluting and cheap. Wouldn’t it be nice if we had the best of both worlds? Well, we can!” claims fission technician @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Nuclear power is reliable, clean, and although it isn’t cheap, it won’t break the bank. There is a risk of deadly meltdown, but this is relatively small, and the only people who could be against this are anti-nuclear protesters, but what do we care about those tree-hugging hippies?”
The Result: protesters are up in arms over new nuclear power stations.
Lifespan -4

—————————————————————————–
#071: Minority Group Demands Language Recognition [Pragmas; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
A group several thousands strong hailing from a remote, isolated corner of @@NAME@@ is staging a massive demonstration on the front steps of your capitol. They demand that their local dialect be recognized as an official language.
The Debate
1. @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Culture, has nothing but disdain for the demonstrators. “The language of @@NAME@@ is as important to our national identity as our history is. A truly erudite individual uses perfect grammar and refuses to speak as those ruffians do.” Your Finance Minister is quick to chime in as well, “If business is required to print every road sign, instruction manual, and fast-food wrapper in two languages, it would increase everybody’s overhead. That means higher prices for the person in the street.”
The Result: a National Academy regulates grammar and usage.
Civil Rights +4

2. “Smarker, but ee’s gone blongie ’round the clonger! Trandy in the blang warked a newtie on the Cheebers, quaff me a duggle if it’s brine. Sorky, hang our trandy high!” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, speaking for the demonstrators, in an apparently rousing response that draws a cascade of cheers. After a few uncomfortable minutes with a professional translator, you find the speaker said, “I respectfully disagree with the Minister. Multilingualism has brought stability to richly-cultured nations such as Brancaland; indeed, I challenge you to provide a single counterexample. I encourage this government to adopt a policy of multilingualism throughout @@NAME@@!”
The Result: children are raised bilingual from an early age.
Taxes +1 (in greater nations)
Culture +1

3. @@RANDOMNAME@@, a radical opposition member who seems to tag along to every demonstration she can find, has her own proposal. “The language barrier is keeping us all apart. What @@NAME@@ needs is a new identity defined by a new language that we can all agree on. That’s unity without favoritism.”
The Result: the government is attempting to impose a new national language on the public.
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————–
#075: Cutting Off Sex Offenders? [Istar; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
After the capture and trial of notorious rapist Henry Taiden, who was convicted of the rape of over 50 women in the past two years a debate has emerged on how he should be punished.

The Debate
1. “That psychopath should be castrated!” cries rape victim @@RANDOMNAME@@, “The agony he put me through must be punished with a means that will ensure that no human being will ever go through what I did! If castration is used more often in these cases you will see rape drop to nothing!”
The Result: sex offenders find themselves cut off from the ability to repeat their crimes.

2. “I understand that this is a terrible time for the poor victims in this case,” says defense attorney @@RANDOMNAME@@, “However, the answer is not to revert back to the dark ages. Instead, we should focus on rehabilitation of all criminals in our prison system.”
The Result: re-education centers are being added to most prisons.

3. “Everyone knows re-education is a waste of money, we shouldn’t go soft on these crooks!” says CEO @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the People Trading Corporation. “Simply place all rapists and criminals in @@NAME@@ into forced labor under the management of our company to serve out their sentences. When we’re through with them, they won’t even think of jaywalking, much less harming another person. We get cheap labor, and these crooks get put straight. Everybody benefits… well, except the crooks.”
The Result: convicted felons are forced into slavery for their crimes.

—————————————————————————–

#076: Suits in Protest [Xibonia; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
Thousands of business men and women have taken to the streets in protest of their working conditions and pay. “It’s not fair that we can’t have a union,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, VP of Sales at SlothCorp. “Just because we make six figures doesn’t mean we don’t deserve overtime too! It’s high time that the lower classes come to appreciate our hard efforts.”

The Debate
1. @@RANDOMNAME@@, secretary of commerce, recommends you ignore these commies. “Free enterprise means not having to succumb to unions, and the world has enough unions already.”
The Result: Pinkerton agents are called in to forcibly break up white collar strikes.
Economy +26
Taxes -3
Authoritarianism -0.030
Business Subsidization +1
Employment +15
Ideological Radicality +4
Income Equality -50
Industry: Information Technology +1
Industry: Mining +1
Lifespan +1
Most Pro-Market +2.6
Obesity +12
Pacifism +4
Rudeness +1.5
Safety -15
Safety from Crime -5
Unexpected Death Rate -1
Wealth Gaps +50
Weaponization +6

2. @@RANDOMNAME@@, secretary of labor, advises you to adjust laws to allow white-collar unions. “It only makes sense that all of the workers in our nation have equal opportunity to benefit from the advantages of collective bargaining.”
The Result: CEOs and corporate executives are frequently found striking for better stock options.

3. “Get these people out of the street!” advises @@RANDOMNAME@@, local police chief. “They’re blocking traffic, and making it impossible for the common man to drive to the megamall!”
The Result: protests are prohibited from blocking traffic.

4. Finally, Right Reverend @@RANDOMNAME@@ proclaims, “The downtrodden are suffering at the hands of the MAN, and these wealthy upper shelf vice presidents are asking to make the rich richer and the poor poorer! The only reason the common worker needs a union is to be able to fight against the oppression of these slave drivers! It’s ludicrous that these greedy scrooges are asking for even MORE money! Send them packing and raise taxes on the wealthy to bring more equality to our nation!”
The Result: local executives are seen on the corner with cardboard signs reading “will oppress the masses for food”.
Economy -8
Taxes +4

Issues 041-060

#041: Software Giant Stomps on Competition [1 Infinite Loop; ed:The SLAGLands]

The Issue
The CEO of @@NAME@@ software, hardware, and electronic headwear giant Microcosm, Inc. has been brought before the Supreme Court for violation of antitrust laws.

The Debate
1. “These allegations are absolutely ludicrous!” shouts Microcosm CEO @@RANDOMNAME@@ from out the window of his 90-foot stretch limo. “Just because rival companies are incapable of producing products as brilliant as mine is no reason to punish ME! I say it’s high time we abolish these idiotic antitrust laws and give big business the freedom to serve the public better. After all, I’m in this business for the people!”
The Result: small businesses are gobbled up almost daily by corporate giants.
Economy +9
Taxes -1

2. “Microcosm must be shut down immediately,” argues CEO of Computers, Computers, Computers! @@RANDOMNAME@@ from out the window of his clunky, exhaust-choked used car. “I can’t get a foothold to compete in the market because those bigwigs in Microcosm have that foothold by the throat! It’s high time the government stepped in and helped out the little man, and the best way to do that is to shut down the big, oppressive, corporate gurus in Microcosm and beyond.”
The Result: the government has begun breaking all large businesses into thousands of mom-and-pop general stores.
Economy -6
Taxes +1

3. “Verily, I say unto thee, none of this would have happened wouldst thou not have stopped the problem before thou didst start it,” argues Brother @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the @@NAME@@ Amish community from out the window of his horse-drawn carriage. “We must doest as the Lord commandeth and abolishest the evils of computers and the Internet entirely. Only whenst we harken unto the Lord’s commandments mayeth we truly be spiritually blessed.”
The Result: citizens frequently whisper of the Internet as ‘the domain of the devil’.
Economy -6

—————————————————————————–
#042: Turn Down That Racket, Say Morality Police [The Prelapsarian State; ed:The SLAGLands]

The Issue
A group of concerned parishioners and soccer moms has petitioned the government of @@NAME@@ to outlaw heavy metal music, which they fear is a bad influence on youngsters.

The Debate
1. “Heavy metal music is a plague in our good nation and its God-fearing people!” argues local priest and easy listening advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Just the other day, I heard a song by some group called Hell’s Irate Puppies with a sinful quantity of bass and drum… oh, and there were probably some lines about killing parents, too, I’d imagine! It’s vital that we ban this music, and remove this terrible influence from our children’s lives! Think of the children!”
The Result: radio stations are forbidden to play anything with too much drum or bass.
Civil Rights -4

2. “Whoa, man… what’s with the, like, censorship and stuff?” asks @@RANDOMNAME@@, scruffy-haired bassist of the popular speed metal band The Destroyinators. “You can’t, like, censor the music, man. That’s how we express ourselves! Every bass beat is me baring my soul! Every howl is me complainin’ about how my parents tried to kick me out of their basement! Besides, what’s wrong with Satan? He’s just misunderstood anyway. I say promote the arts, man!”
The Result: elevator music has been replaced by thrash metal played at maximum volume.
Civil Rights +1

3. “You know, this heavy metal issue has me thinking,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your brother, over your weekly game of cribbage. “If these long-haired freaks want to put out their devil-worshipping metal, why don’t we let them? Of course, we’ll put a little subliminal propoganda into every song… after all, don’t these guys owe their freedom of expression to you?”
The Result: angst-filled teenagers are rushing off to buy government bonds for some odd reason.
Civil Rights -11

—————————————————————————–
#043: Prisoners Demand Elbow Room [Lucazmodei; ed:The SLAGLands]

The Issue
In a display of unity that can best be described as “highly unnerving,” criminals and law enforcement officials alike are up in arms about recent overcrowding within prisons in @@NAME@@.

The Debate
1. “I tell ya, chief… this ain’t good,” mutters local police chief @@RANDOMNAME@@ over his morning cup of coffee. “I see these no-good mohawk-wearin’ punks every day, and they’re a dangerous bunch. They gotta be locked in their mudholes forever! If we can’t afford to keep ’em in prison, I say we need more money! Let’s just casually shift some funding from elsewhere; after all, it ain’t like our welfare program is helping keep these kids away from crime.”
The Result: gigantic new prisons are springing up all over the nation.
Civil Rights -1

2. “How can these wayward individuals find their inner selves by staring at the walls within a stone cell?” challenges human rights activist and local prison license plate maker @@RANDOMNAME@@. “The nation’s budget is absolute proof: we cannot afford prisons… strictly because of their immorality! Let these caged birds breathe the sweet air of freedom again! Shut down all prisons in @@NAME@@!”
The Result: all prisons have been eliminated.
Taxes -2

3. “Now hold on just a second here,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, CEO of @@NAME@@’s most widely-known pizza delivery chain, Papa Pallocci’s Pizza Pagoda. “You’ve got a problem with prisoners, and I’ve got a problem finding employees. Why don’t you just send some of your criminals to Papa Pallocci’s? We’ll put ’em to work at lower pay as punishment for their crimes! I win, you win… the economy wins!”
The Result: needs to be updated

—————————————————————————–
#044: No Pain, No Gain! [Independent Planets; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
Due to the recent capture of a foreign terrorist in @@NAME@@, high-level military officials want the government to authorize torture to extract information about other terrorist activities.

The Debate
1. “Torture is the only way that we can get these idiots to tell us anything,” says General @@RANDOMNAME@@ of @@NAME@@’s special forces division. “After all, violence is the only shared language we have with these scum.”
The Result: torture is commonly used to extract information from suspected criminals.
Ciil Rights -3
Taxes +3

2. “Are you kidding?” states political activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Torture never works. If anything, it should be outlawed. What do we want to become, genocidal maniacs?
The Result: torture is illegal.
Civil Rights +6

3. “There’s nothing wrong with torture, but we can’t make it too obvious,” says Secretary of Defense @@RANDOMNAME@@. “How about we simply ask them nicely, and then, if they don’t tell us, we kill them? That’s better just from the intimidation.”
The Result: people regularly disappear off the streets and all evidence of them is destroyed.
Civil Rights -9
Taxes +4

—————————————————————————–
#045: Baseball League Steps Up To The Plate [Pilot; ed:The SLAGLands]

The Issue
The Batter Up! Baseball League has begun to grow in popularity and is now seeking government support in establishing teams and stadiums throughout the nation.

The Debate
1. “Holy cow, is this gonna be great!” hollers BUBL President and sports nut @@RANDOMNAME@@, wearing a fashionable giant foam finger on his right hand. “Baseball is just what @@NAME@@ needs right now! Think about it: soda, popcorn, hot dogs… oh, and I’m sure the economy will benefit somehow, too! All we need is the government funding to build stadiums and teams, and we’ll be on every TV and in every city in the country!”
The Result: major cities shut down as their local sports team takes to the field every day.
Economy +1

2. “You’re going to spend the taxpayer’s money on WHAT?” counters Minister of Finance @@RANDOMNAME@@, from a newly furnished office. “I mean, I love playing a good game of baseball every now and then, but does the government really need to go around supporting this? The only people that are going to benefit are a bunch of fat-cat burger vendors and bored hicks with nothing better to do on Sunday afternoon! We need to stop spending so much money on these ridiculous games and get back to what’s really important: running the business of the country.”
The Result: the nation is experiencing a severe shortage of sporting events.
Economy -3

—————————————————————————–

#047: The Great Wall of @@NAME@@? [1 Infinite Loop; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Due to the ongoing wars in neighboring countries, a recent rash of illegal immigrants have been caught at the borders of @@NAME@@, prompting many citizens to call for tighter immigration laws.

The Debate
1. @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the @@NAME@@ National Purity League says “These illegal aliens are just an eyesore with their strange customs and funny languages. Uneducated immigrants like these only worsen crime and steal valuable jobs! I say we should boot them all out on their ears and put a big fence around the country!”
The Results: a large concrete wall is being built around the country’s borders.

2. @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the @@NAME@@ Civil Liberties Union says “We must welcome these refugees from any nation into our open arms, they are fleeing one oppressive dictatorial regime in the only way they know, we must not let them think they’re jumping from the frying pan into the fire!”
The Results: refugees from other nations are flocking to NATION’s border.

3. “Hold on there, hold on people!” says @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the @@NAME@@ Broadcasting company, “We don’t have to take either extreme, all we have to do is make a TV game show out of it! We put deadly obstacles on the border and monitor it with television cameras! Those that make it across win freedom and citizenship, and those who don’t, well, lets just say that our buzzards won’t starve. We could call it ‘Who Wants to be an Immigrant?’!”
The Results: the controversial show ‘Who Wants to be an Immigrant?’ has become wildly popular.

—————————————————————————–

#049: Diving For @@CURRENCY@@s [Nogero; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Divers from a local scuba club have discovered an enormous underwater gold deposit that could be worth billions of @@CURRENCY@@s in one of @@NAME@@’s lakes. It has also caused a huge debate over who should be allowed to plunder the goods.

The Debate
1. @@RANDOMNAME@@, a cabinet member, would like the government to seize the deposit. “This is an excellent time to boost @@NAME@@’s economy and increase our foreign trade with other countries! Who cares about the people that discovered the deposit? They’ve done their country a great favor and should let us have the money!”
The Result: the government seizes all major gold finds.
Civil Rights -11
Economy +3

2. @@RANDOMNAME@@, a civil rights activist, vehemently disagrees. “The deposit was found by private citizens and it should be their choice of what to do with the gold. If the government goes around stealing what is rightfully ours, then I shudder to think I live in such a corrupt country. These people discovered the gold, it’s now their time to get rich! Nevermind the fact they were diving in a lake on government property!”
The Result: citizens are regularly found digging for treasure in their gardens.
Civil Rights +5

3. “We should do what now?” Environmentalist @@RANDOMNAME@@ exclaims. “Do you have any idea how damaging it would be to the environment to mine the gold under that lake? Think of all the aquatic life that would be disrupted or destroyed! Think of how an otherwise pristine lake view would be ruined! Forget the gold and keep those money-grubbing pigs away from nature!”
The Result: the mining industry has taken a hit from tighter environmental regulations.
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————
#050: Whips, Chains, And Leather, Oh My! [Yacatizma; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
An organized crowd of leather-clad individuals, some of whom are on leashes, are protesting against discrimination for those who share their interests.

The Debate
1. “We happen to express our love differently, with different hobbies and activities,” explains BDSM enthusiast @@RANDOMNAME@@, while wearing needle-sharp spiked heels and holding a whip. “Shops exist to cater to the needs of ‘normal’ people, but do you have ANY idea how hard it is to get a quality whip? A little support for our hobbies would be appreciated!”
The Result: a niche industry catering to S&M enthusiasts has sprung up.

2. “Yeah,” exclaims @@RANDOMNAME@@, another enthusiast, wearing nothing but a collar, “and like other couples, we want the right to display our affection in public. If Master wants to take me walkies in public, he should be able to.”
The Result: leather-clad individuals can be seen walking their slaves in public parks.
Civil Rights +1
Economy +2
Taxes +1
Nudity +5
Social Conservatism -1
Youth Rebelliousness +1

3. @@RANDOMNAME@@ dissents wholeheartedly. “This is not about showing affection–this is about moral decency. Think of the children, for God’s sake! Think of the children! We must criminalize and eliminate this perversion to keep them safe. Which of course means a special task force to track down and capture these cretins!”
The Result: midnight raids drag couples from their homes in the name of decency.
Civil Rights -5

—————————————————————————–

#051: Streaker in Snooker Game Fiasco [Sirocco; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
After a sixty year old man with psoriasis streaked past cameras and millions of sports fans during the snooker league playoffs, protesters have called for tougher action.

The Debate
1. “This can’t go on!” says traumatized snooker player @@RANDOMNAME@@, “Children are watching sports and having them exposed to this lewd behaviour is unacceptable! I demand that these people be locked up for several years and maybe they’ll have learnt their lesson!”
The Results: naturists are jailed regularly for indecent exposure.
Civil Rights -1

2. “Oh don’t be ridiculous!” scoffs prolific streaker @@RANDOMNAME@@, “It’s all just a bit of fun and the kids shouldn’t be wrapped in cotton wool, or they’ll learn nothing! Sports are so dull anyway, it needs a little bare skin to liven it up. Streaking should be legal!”
The Results: streakers swamp all public events in order to bare it all.
Civil Rights +6

—————————————————————————–

#052: Is It Art Or Is It Porn? [Imnsvale; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Vocal members of the Moral Minority have been complaining and petitioning the government about the new art gallery displaying several provocative nude portraits by several famous artists. Moral Minority members claim these pieces of work promote prostitution and indecent sexual acts.

The Debate
1. “Stop my children from looking at smut! These artists are only perverts pretending to be artists! Think of the children!” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, proud parent and member of Mothers Promoting Purity. “These artists are only going to rouse our innocent children to commit grotesque acts of immorality! Get rid of it all!”
The Result: artists regularly face criminal charges and art-burning parties are common.
Civil Rights -5

2. “Well, I see that point, but we certainly don’t need to ban inoffensive art, still lifes of inanimate objects and such,” says your sister, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Perhaps we should set some guidelines for what is acceptable as art and what isn’t. Artistic renditions of people getting it on are one thing. A bunch of fruit in a decorative bowl is another entirely.”
The Result: all artwork is carefully screened for offensive material.

3. “That is censorship!” says noted art history teacher @@RANDOMNAME@@. “You can’t ban art! It’s freedom of expression; it’s part of our culture. If anything, the government should be supporting these artists and their work, not listening to these prudish whackjobs who are scared of a little bare skin!”
The Result: needs to be updated

—————————————————————————–

#054: Time To Put The Older Senators Out To Pasture? [Pangaa; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Many people are starting to think that it’s time to put term limits on elected officials, given the average age of 70 years old and 40 years of service in the nation’s Parliament.

The Debate
1. “It’s time to get these lifetime politicians off the government payroll!” says term-limits advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Let them get real jobs like the rest of us once they leave office. Besides, if they are currently a Senator, they can always run for another office like Governor. This gives people the right to elect whomever they want to run for office, just not the same office forever. It’ll keep things from going completely stale!”
The Results: strict term limits have been applied to all elected offices.

2. “Wait a minute,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, chairman of the national Infinite Power party. “We pay a lot of money to get those people into office. It can take several terms before we get a return on our investment, I mean, candidates. We should extend the number of years for each term, not limit the number of times a person can serve in any specific office!”
The Results: elected officials often serve for decades in a single term.
Political Freedoms -1

3. Your aunt’s mother’s step-sister’s best friend’s hairstylist, @@RANDOMNAME@@, pooh-poohs the entire idea. “You know how to run your country, yes? Why deal with the hassle of elected officials and elections in the first place, yes? Eliminate elections and this entire term limit issue becomes moot, yes?”
The Results: elections are outlawed and a hairstylist has recently received a government appointment.
Political Freedoms -12

—————————————————————————-

#055: Bigtopian Protesters Cry For Full Integration [Grantwold; ed:The SLAGLands]

The Issue
Bigtopian activists have staged a sit-in at the largest primary school in @@NAME@@ bringing education to a halt in a bid for integration and tolerance.

The Debate
1. “You know… it’s not that we don’t let them in… it’s that they don’t apply,” murmurs Principal @@RANDOMNAME@@, nervously tugging at his shirt collar. “I mean, yeah, sure, if these Bigtopians lived around here… uh… we’d let them into the school. But… you know… this isn’t exactly a Bigtopian community, you know? So… uh… could you please put a stop to these protestors? Oh, and, uh…” Here he leans forward and whispers. “… make sure those creepy Bigtopian protestors don’t show up at my school again, okay?”
The Result: government police forces protect public schools from the threat of protest.

2. “The time has come for the dream of equality to be realized!” shouts noted Bigtopian rights activist @@RANDOMNAME@@, slamming his fist against your desk. “I see Lilliputians, Tasmanians, and Lord knows how many East Lebatuckese keeping my Bigtopian brothers holed away in their prisons of blindness and ethnic apartheid! The time has come for full integration! If these schools are going to keep us out, I say it’s time we were bussed in!”
The Result: minority children spend hours bussing to schools miles away from home

3. “Well, that’s all well and good, but it ain’t well and good enough!” screams @@RANDOMNAME@@, leader of Bigtopians Rising Against Totalitarianist Scum, slamming his black-gloved fist against his podium during a recent pep rally. “We ain’t just bein’ kept out of their schools; we’re bein’ kept out of their neighborhoods! The oppressive majority fears us, but they can’t hold us back any longer! The government needs to integrate the community as a whole by pushing out the majority and making way for a very loud, very angry minority!”
The Result: members of majority races are forced out of their homes to make way for Bigtopians.
Civil Rights -4
Taxes +5

—————————————————————————–
#056: “Give Us Money!” Quoth the Poet [Ursoria; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
The National Poetry Society of @@NAME@@ is demanding government-funded programs to promote the arts, especially poetry.

The Debate
1. “We need government help to promote culture.” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, chairperson of the National Poetry Society of @@NAME@@. “Poetry is the soul of our nation, the very pulse of humanity! We will ultimately be judged according to our contribution to artistic enlightenment. In other words, please provide funding for our humble mission to bring the beauty of poetry to the masses!”
The Result: people reciting Shakespeare have become a common sight.
Economy +3
Taxes +3

2. “Artists and poets should support themselves, like everyone else,” replies @@RANDOMNAME@@, spokesperson for the Capitalism Now Party. “The suffering taxpayers should be given a break. In fact, we should abolish all government subsidies for special interest groups.”
The Result: the government has cut its subsidies for all special interest groups
taxes -5
Averageness -33
Culture -2
Defense forces -2
Environmental Beauty -4
Freedom From Taxation +1
Law Enforcement -2
Obesity -2
Pacifism +2
Public Transportation -2
Safety -2
Taxation -1
Tourism -3
Welfare -2

3. “Poets–who needs them?!” scoffs @@RANDOMNAME@@, Chairperson Emeritus of the Troglodyte Coalition. “These long-haired troublemakers should all be lined up against the wall and shot! That would be far more entertaining than reading some dumb poems!”
The Result: poets and writers are regularly rounded up and shot for entertainment.
Civil Rights -4

—————————————————————————–
#058: Violent Violetists Demand Blood! [Total n Utter Insanity; ed:Reploid Productions]

The Issue
Members of a new weird religious cult, called the Order of Violet, ask for the government to appease their mighty god by offering Her a sacrifice of the human variety.

The Debate
1. “What have we got to lose?” says religious freedoms advocate @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Just cut up a few homeless folk – it appeases this group’s bloodthirsty Goddess, gets rid of unsightly bums that drain welfare, and everybody goes home happy.”
The Result: homeless people are periodically found dead upon altars to assorted deities.
Civil Rights +5
Taxes -1

2. “We must go much further than a few beggars!” argues the overzealous High Member of the Order of Violet, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “You must pass a law that everyone’s first born child must be slaughtered, on live TV if possible. Think of the viewing figures!”
The Result: “The Daily Sacrifice” is a routine segment of morning news shows.
Civil Rights -7

3. “You aren’t going to listen to these whackjob Violetists, are you?” comments @@RANDOMNAME@@ while leading a prayer group. “Human sacrifices! Surely we’re too civilized to permit such barbaric practices! These lunatic fringe groups should be outlawed, and their leaders should be executed!”
The Result: a crusade against barbaric religious practices has begun.
Civil Rights -1

4. “Who’s being a lunatic?” retorts @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the @@NAME@@ Humanitarian Society. “I agree that these practices ought to be outlawed, but instead of sinking to the same level of these fanatics and killing our fellow people, why not simply start a re-education program? Even the worst person can be rehabilitated into a useful member of society, with enough time, care, and lots and lots of funding!”
The Result: the government pours millions of CURRENCY into rehabilitation programs annually.
Taxes +2

—————————————————————————–

#059: Drunk Driving On The Rise [Cspalla; ed:SalusaSecondus]

The Issue
More and more, citizens are drinking before getting behind the wheel. A group of concerned citizens wants something done.

The Debate
1. @@RANDOMNAME@@, head of @@NAME@@’s chapter of Alcoholics Anonymous, says that drunk drivers need help. “Alcoholism is a nasty thing, a disease. The government has to help these poor souls to avoid the temptations of liquor, and wine, and beer, and hard cider, and brandy, and?” His eyes get a glazed far off look, “Where was I? Oh right, we have to help these people, not imprison them.”
The Results: drunk drivers are sent to rehabilitation paid for by the government.
Taxes +1

2. “That’s lovely,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a noted anti-alcohol advocate, “In a perfect world where rehab fixes everything. But this is the real world, and it doesn’t bring back the victims. Drunk drivers kill people every day. If they take other’s lives, the government must take theirs!”
The Results: drunk drivers are sentenced to death.

3. “All of those plans attack the symptoms, not the disease,” says Minister of Transportation @@RANDOMNAME@@, “Alcohol is a curse, a poison sent by the Devil to tempt mankind. We cannot trust people to make decisions for themselves. The only answer is prohibition. Ban alcohol completely.”
The Results: all alcohol is banned.
Civil Rights -1

Issues 021-040

#021: Police Consider “Big Brother” Anti-Crime System

The Issue
The Police department is considering installing surveillance cameras in all major public areas, in an effort to crack down on crime.

The Debate
1. “This is a blatant invasion of the right to privacy!” says libertarian web site operator @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Now I can’t even go out in public any more without being watched? And you know this is just the beginning. Today there are cameras in city streets. Tomorrow they’re peering through your bedroom window.”
The Results: surveillance cameras are banned.
Civil rights +6

2. “Hey, I’ve got news for you,” says Police media liaison @@RANDOMNAME@@. “When you’re out in public, PEOPLE CAN SEE YOU. These cameras will be extremely helpful in reducing the national crime rate. Frankly, I can’t see what the fuss is about.”
The Results: all major public areas are watched by police surveillance cameras.
Civil rights -5
Safety +3

3. “This ‘slippery slope’ argument has got me thinking,” says Police Minister @@RANDOMNAME@@. “You know, it would be a lot easier to fight crime if we watched people all the time. Not with cameras, of course. That’s clearly an invasion of privacy. But how about a national database of our citizens, coupled with compulsory ID cards and barcoding? It would stop crime dead in its tracks.”
The Results: citizens are barcoded to keep track of their movements
Civil rights -30
Political freedoms -18
Safety +3
Safety From Crime +2

——————————————————————————
#022: Nazi Sympathizers Plan Rally

The Issue
Far-right-wing Nazi supporters plan to stage a rally in the city center tomorrow, giving voice to their violent, racist views.

The Debate
1. “Frankly, I’m appalled that the government can even consider allowing this travesty to go ahead,” says prominent Jewish personality @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We can’t let these animals broadcast their message of hate. Surely @@NAME@@ is too civilized for that.”
The Results: it is illegal to make racist remarks in public
Political Freedoms -8
Averageness -2

2. “It’s exactly because we’re civilized that we must let the demonstration proceed,” says free speech campaigner @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We may not like what they have to say, but in this society, people have the right to argue whatever political view they want, no matter how hateful, selfish, or stupid it is.”
The Results: the tenet of free speech is held dear
Political Freedoms +21

——————————————————————————
#023: Uranium Deposit Promises To Enrich @@NAME@@

The Issue
Prospecting company Nukes4U has uncovered a large uranium deposit in @@NAME@@’s south-west.

The Debate
1. “This is a terrific find!” claims Nukes4U CEO @@RANDOMNAME@@. “It will provide an enormous stimulus to our economy and create thousands of new jobs. It’s win-win! All we need from the government is permission to bulldoze the rainforest that’s on top of the deposit.”
The Results: the country’s famous rainforests are being bulldozed by the mining industry.
Economy +2
Eco-friendliness -2
Tourism -26

2. “You’ve got to be kidding,” says Green politician @@RANDOMNAME@@. “This rainforest is thousands of years old! This country needs more environmental protection, not less. And to destroy the environment in order to mine uranium that then goes into nuclear bombs–well, that really sticks in my craw.”
The Results: tourists from around the world come to visit the country’s famous rainforests.
Eco-Friendliness +1
Taxes +1

3. “There’s no need for an either-or decision,” says the government’s Minister for Mining, Clear-Felling, and the Environment. “We can preserve most of the rainforest and allow mining of a small part. After all, think of all the good that the money from this uranium deposit can bring to @@NAME@@.”
The Results: the mining industry is making inroads into environmentally sensitive areas
Taxes +7
Eco-Friendliness -1

——————————————————————————
#024: Budget Time: Accountants Excited

The Issue
It’s time for the government to allocate spending for the coming year, and as always, special interest groups are keen to have their say.

The Debate
1. “The state of the education system is, in many areas, simply frightful,” says Teachers Union leader @@RANDOMNAME@@. “And even where we are doing well, we could do better. I appeal to the authorities for a substantial boost in funding. Remember, the children are our future.”
The Results: a large-scale revitalization of the education system is underway

2. “We won’t have a future unless we improve police numbers and rebuild the military,” says General @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Oh, it’s all well and good to have your fancy education and your nice cars, until some tinpot dictatorship decides to invade. And don’t pretend like there aren’t any of them in our region. Our number one priority has to be security.”
The Results: military spending recently hit a new high
Taxes +1
Political Freedoms -8

3. “Education is nice, but Health and Social Welfare are more important,” says celebrity social worker @@RANDOMNAME@@. “This is where the people who really need government help are: the marginalized of our society. If we don’t help them, what kind of a nation are we?”
The Results: a well-funded social safety net protects the unfortunate
Welfare +2

4. “Hey, I’ve got a crazy idea,” says noted libertarian and bird-watcher @@RANDOMNAME@@. “How about the government stops taking so much tax from people? Give us a tax cut and we’ll buy the things we need ourselves. People need to be weaned off the government teat!”
The Results: citizens are enjoying a recent large cut in taxes
Taxes -4

—————————————————————————-
#025: Cloning Research Promises New Breakthrough
The Issue
Scientists using cloned human embryos for research are on the verge of a medical breakthrough.

The Debate
1. “It’s really very exciting,” says lab head @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Until now, we’ve kept very quiet, to avoid being targeted by lunatic fringe groups who for some reason think it’s wrong to clone human embryos. It’s too early to promise anything, but we hope that one day we will have genetic cures for a whole range of debilitating illnesses. I certainly hope the government will support our work.”
The Results: scientists regularly clone human beings for research purposes
Taxes +1

2. “Well, if you have to be part of a lunatic fringe group to object to this barbaric practice, I’m a lunatic,” says placard-waving protestor @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Of course it would be nice to cure these unnamed diseases, but at what cost? They’re messing with the sanctity of human life. It’s wrong, and the lab should be shut down immediately.”
The Results: genetic researchers have been expelled
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————
#026: Compulsory Organ Harvesting Proposed

The Issue
A group of emergency room doctors has petitioned the government to introduce mandatory organ donations.
The Debate
1. “It’s not as crazy as it sounds,” says Dr. @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Every day, people die because we don’t have the organs to save them. Well, that and widespread under-funding of the health system. But the point is, if the government allowed us to take organs from dead people, we could save hundreds of lives a year. And come on, it’s not like dead people need them.”
The Results: organ donation is compulsory
Civil Rights -4

2. “You keep your damn hands off my organs!” says alarmed hospital patient @@RANDOMNAME@@. “They are my organs, and I’ll do with them what I like. The government has no right to my body.”
The Results: organ donation rates are among the lowest in the region
Civil Rights +20

—————————————————————————-
#027: Cash for Colons?

The Issue
Hospitals have requested that they be allowed to pay people for donating blood and other bodily organs, such as kidneys.

The Debate
1. “We remain critically short of blood plasma and various organs,” says @@NAME@@ One hospital administrator @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Especially hearts. A good heart is hard to find. But if we were allowed to pay for donations, we’d get more of them and could save more lives. Plus the donor takes home a few hundred @@CURRENCY@@s in compensation. Unless it’s a post-mortem donation, of course. In that case we’d pay the family.”
The Results: college students make ends meet by selling their kidneys
Civil Rights +19
Economy +6

2. “Great idea,” says social commentator @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Except for one thing. You know who’s going to be selling their organs? Poor people! They’ll be so desperate for money that they’ll sell their own kidneys. Well, a kidney. This is just another way for the rich to buy themselves a better life at the expense of the poor. It must be outlawed.”
The Results: organ donation rates have hit a new low
Taxes -1
Economy -13

—————————————————————————
#028: Cancer Sufferer Demands Euthanasia Bill

The Issue
Dorothy Terwilliger lies immobilized in a hospital bed, unable to move. She has end-stage cancer, and wishes to end her struggle against death. However, laws prevent her doctors from obeying her wishes.

The Debate
1. Dorothy and her family are campaigning for a “Dying with Dignity” bill, to change this situation. She implores the government to legalize euthanasia.
The Results: euthanasia is legal.
Civil Rights +1

2. “I understand this is a very difficult time for these people,” says freelance medical writer @@RANDOMNAME@@. “But the solution is not to let our medical system slide down the slippery slope of killing people in pain. We must cure, not kill. This is not the right time for euthanasia.”
The Results: euthanasia is illegal.
Civil Rights -2

3. “I agree, but go further: there is never a right time for euthanasia,” says Bishop @@RANDOMNAME@@. “The lives we lead are given to us by the grace of God, and he decides when they end. It is not for us to question God’s divine purpose, no matter how odd or screwed-up it may seem.”
The Results: euthanasia is illegal
Civil Rights -6
Taxes -1
Godlessness +1
Religiousness +3

—————————————————————————-
#029: Minorities Demand Representation In TV Soaps

The Issue
@@NAME@@’s TV soaps–famous around the region–have come under fire for their lack of ethnic diversity.

The Debate
1. “Every night my family and I sit down to watch ‘The Brash and the Backstabbing’,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@. “But where are the Lilliputians like myself? Where are the Bigtopians? The Marche Noirians? People from those cultures can be just as brash and backstabbing, but we never see them on the screen. The government must act to remove this silent apartheid from our TV screens.”
The Results: TV shows must meet strict ethnicity quotas.
Civil Rights -8
Economy -6
Taxes +3

2. “Those Lilliputians don’t know how good they have it,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, spokesperson for the Tasmanians Against Ethnic Stereotyping. “Tasmanians are on television all the time, but always in crude, stereotypical roles. The answer is not to enforce ethnic quotas, but to award government prizes for the positive portrayal of minorities. That’ll work better, and be cheaper, too.”
The Results: the government awards prizes to television shows featuring stereotype-breaking minority roles
Civil Rights -4
Economy -2
Taxes +1

3. “The government should do what now?” says TV studio executive @@RANDOMNAME@@. “You’ve got to be kidding. We make soaps here, not documentaries. I should be able to put whichever characters I want into my shows. Quotas! Government prizes! God save me! Hasn’t the government got anything better to do? Why don’t they just back off and let society work out these things on its own?”
The Results: the alarmingly racist TV show ‘Bigtopians Say the Darndest Things’ is a hit.
Civil Rights +5
Economy +7
Taxes -4

—————————————————————————-
#030: Auto Industry Struggles Against Foreign Imports

The Issue
Cheap, foreign-made cars are becoming increasingly popular, causing concern in @@NAME@@’s automobile manufacturing industry.

The Debate
1. “Unless this government does something, @@NAME@@ won’t have an auto industry for much longer,” says auto industry union boss @@RANDOMNAME@@, in a rare public appearance alongside management. “These foreign companies employ people for a few @@CURRENCY@@s a day. The only way to level the playing field is to raise tariffs. The government would make more money, too, so it’s win-win.”
The Results: punitive tariffs protect local industry.
Taxes -2
Economy +8

2. “For once, I agree with my grubby colleague here,” says General Chassis CEO @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Although I have to say, tariffs aren’t the only answer. A more effective solution would be to abolish minimum wage laws. Now that would level the playing field. And we’d be able to employ more–argh, let go of my throat!”
The Results: there are no minimum wage laws.
Economy +6
Taxes -2

3. “I think we need to face facts,” says noted economist and chat-show regular @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We live in a global economy now, and automobile manufacturing just isn’t @@NAME@@’s strong suit. There’s no point taking money from taxpayers in order to line the pockets of a few greedy workers and corrupt managers in a doomed industry. Let the market take its–argh, let go of my throat!”
The Results: all tariffs have been abolished.
Economy +2

——————————————————————————
Thursday, November 8, 2012
Issues from #031 to #039
#031: Get Efficient, Private Sector Tells Nature [MantiCorp GroundForces]

The Issue
A group of prominent business identities has proposed privatizing @@NAME@@’s beaches.

The Debate
1. “Have you been to the beach lately? It’s disgusting,” says company spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. “There’s litter, there’s teenagers smoking, and there are people enjoying themselves without paying for it. Let the private sector in on this, and @@NAME@@’s beaches will be the talk of the region! And a nice little earner, too.”
The Results: citizens must pay to enjoy NATION’s pristine beaches.
Economy +6
Taxes -1

2. “Whoa, whoa, we’re privatizing beaches now?” says local campaigner @@RANDOMNAME@@. “These are public spaces! All @@NAME@@’s citizens have a right to enjoy them, not just the well-off. Yes, we should improve the quality of our beaches, but handing them over to the money-grabbers is not the right way to do it. The right way to do it is to boost government spending by increasing taxes.”
The Results: a government program is underway to revitalize NATION’s beaches.
Taxes +1

—————————————————————————
#032: One Wife Is Never Enough, Say Polygamists [Fantasan]

The Issue
A small religious group is lobbying the government to allow them to take multiple wives.

The Debate
1. “It’s about time we had our religious rights recognized,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, a devout member of a faith that is never made quite clear. “Who is the government to tell me I can’t love more than one woman? The government doesn’t know how much of me there is to go around!”
The Results: polygamy is legal
Civil Rights +2

2. “This is nothing more than sexual deviants using religion as a pretext for perversion!” says Reverend @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Marriage is one man, one woman, and death do we part. What’s so hard to get? Anything else is a perversion, and must be banned.”
The Results: the institution of marriage is held sacred and strictly enforced.
Civil Rights -1
Godlessness -2
Religiousness +2

3. “Multiple wives? Excellent!” says passer-by @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Presumably we will allow multiple husbands, as well. And gay marriages, of course. In fact, now is probably the time for the government to butt out of marriage altogether. Let people marry their cats, if they want.”
The Results: there have been reports of people marrying housepets.
Civil Rights +8

————————————————————————-
#033: Genetics Brings New Life to Extinct Species [Badger Lozzate]

The Issue
Scientists have announced they are close to a breakthrough in their quest to revive the feather-bellied @@ANIMAL@@, a species related to @@NAME@@’s national animal that has been extinct for more than a century.

The Debate
1. “I, for one, applaud their work,” says scientist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “And not just because I’m the project leader. This is an example of how @@NAME@@’s brains can mix it with the world’s best. Can you imagine how wonderful it will be to have feather-bellied @@ANIMAL@@s frolicking in the meadows again? I say full steam ahead, and more government funding!”
The Results: scientists recently cloned the long-extinct feather-bellied ANIMAL.

2. “This is a sacrilege!”, says religious leader @@RANDOMNAME@@. “These animals are extinct because God wants them dead. Cloning them would merely incur his wrath! If we proceed down this path, it’ll be humans, not the feather-bellied @@ANIMAL@@, who will be extinct.”
The Results: genetic research has been halted.
Taxes +1

3. “Now, come on,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, well-known philosopher. “You don’t need to be religious to be unnerved by the top of this particular slippery slope. Today it’s @@ANIMAL@@s, tomorrow it’s dinosaurs, and we all know how that turns out. This research shouldn’t be banned, but there must be strict government controls over its use.”
The Results: genetic research is temporarily tied up in government red tape.
Taxes +1

———————————————————————-
#034: Don’t Puff On Me, Say Non-Smokers [Sirocco]

The Issue
There is a growing call within @@NAME@@ to abolish smoking in public areas.

The Debate
1. “I’m in full support of this motion,” says man on the street @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I’m sick of being stuck behind smokers, sucking in their pollution! They can light up in the privacy of their own homes, if they want.”
The Results: smoking is banned in public areas.
Civil Rights -4

2. “What’s so special about their homes?” says anti-smoking campaigner @@RANDOMNAME@@. “The government has a responsibility to stop people from hurting themselves — it’s the same reason we should make them wear seat belts in cars. Sooner or later, they end up in one of @@NAME@@’s hospitals, sucking on taxpayer-funded healthcare. Not that that’s why we should ban smoking. We should ban it because we care.”
The Results: an underground movement of cigarette smokers has sprung up in response to a government ban.
Civil Rights -4
Economy -1
Taxes +1

3. “Get your hands off my fag!” wheezes long-time smoker @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I’ve been smoking for fifty years and it’s never done me any harm. Helps me concentrate, it does! The government should back off on trying to tell me what I can put into my own body. Telling a smoker he can’t light up in a restaurant is discrimination, pure and simple. If you want to put a stop to unfairness, stop that.”
The Results: eight year-olds can be seen lighting up in public areas.
Lifespan -1

—————————————————————————
#035: Refugees Want To Call @@NAME@@ Home [The True Scroat]

The Issue
After several bloody conflicts in nearby regions, a stream of asylum-seekers and refugees has been spotted heading for @@NAME@@’s shores.

The Debate
1. “Some of these people have endured terrible hardships to reach our borders,” says International Red Cross spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We must welcome these unfortunates with open arms. Let the world see that @@NAME@@ does not turn its back on those in need!”
The Results: the nation has opened its arms to an influx of refugees.
Averageness -5
Safety -3
Safety From Crime -2
Youth Rebelliousness +1

2. “These grasping freeloaders will swamp our culture and traditions!” argues talk-radio host @@RANDOMNAME@@. “First they want welfare, next thing you know they’re taking our jobs — and you know they won’t bother to learn our language. I say charity begins at home — and this isn’t their home. This is the world’s problem, not ours.”
The Results: the Navy has outraged the international community by sinking a boatload of refugees to prevent them reaching the shore.

3. Economics Professor @@RANDOMNAME@@ offers an alternative. “There is no question that we have to help those who reach out to us in their darkest hour. But on the other hand, we cannot help everybody. So let’s just take the ones who are willing to keep our streets clean and our drains flowing in return for a subsistence wage.”
The Results: shanty towns are forming in the suburbs of major cities.
Economy +1

—————————————————————————
#036: International Community Comes Doorknocking [Guadalcanal]

The Issue
The international community has appealed to @@NAME@@ to increase humanitarian aid to the world’s poorer nations.

The Debate
1. “We must increase foreign aid,” says beaded local peace activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Compared to some of these nations, @@NAME@@ is swimming in @@CURRENCY@@s. Let’s face it, not every nation in the world is lucky enough to have a government like ours. Let’s show some compassion to our less economically gifted neighbors.”
The Results: the nation has an international reputation for compassion.
Taxes +2

2. “Talk about a way to flush @@CURRENCY@@s straight down the toilet,” argues Think Tank member @@RANDOMNAME@@. “What I’ve noticed is that whenever we do give something, it’s never enough: a few years later they’re back asking for more. The best way to help these poor nations is to stop shielding them from the logical consequences of their idiotic, long-debunked socialist economic policies.”
The Results: the nation refuses to provide international aid.
Taxes -1

3. “Relief wouldn’t hurt us… if we ‘relieved’ the right countries,” suggests government advisor @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We give them a little humanitarian aid, they give us access to their @@MAJORINDUSTRY@@ markets… it’s win-win. Nothing wrong with a little quid pro quo, especially for a good cause.”
The Results: the government extracts trade concessions from poor nations in exchange for humanitarian aid.

—————————————————————————
#037: Traffic Cops Needed on Information Superhighway? [Snowcat]

The Issue
Certain shadowy ministerial figures have proposed government monitoring of individual internet usage.

The Debate
1. “In these days of terror and uncertainty, it’s exactly what we need,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, signing an arrest warrant. “Every pervert, terrorist, bomb-building maniac and anti-government idiot is currently online. I’m not saying that we should block citizens from seeing it, but let’s also watch who’s seeking it out. This will give our law enforcement officers the chance to prevent crimes before they happen. If you’ve done nothing wrong, you’ve got nothing to hide.”
The Results: the government snoops on private internet connections.
Civil Rights -1

2. “Well, I AM saying we should block out that filth,” says a man in a dark hat, stepping from the shadows. “If people want to use the internet, they can view our government-approved sites. Those are swell.”
The Results: the country has unplugged its internet connection to prevent subversive content.
Civil Rights -5
Economy -4
Political Freedoms -3

3. Privacy activist @@RANDOMNAME@@ is outraged, as usual. “Tyranny is the natural result of limiting information! Someone, somewhere, will always find something offensive — mimes for example. Those scare the hell out of me. But should we ban them? No! Free the internet! We have nothing to fear from free information but pop-up advertising!”
The Results: anti-government web sites are springing up.
Civil Rights +5

—————————————————————————–
#038: @@NAME@@ Looks to the Stars [Sentient Peoples]

The Issue
The recent popularity of a science-fiction TV show has prompted calls for @@NAME@@ to develop its own space program.

The Debate
1. “Don’t tell me space colonies wouldn’t be cool,” says excited fifth-grade teacher @@RANDOMNAME@@, still wearing big Spock ears from his last convention. “Think of how they would galvanize the national population! And there would also be some kind of scientific benefit, probably.”
The Results: billions of CURRENCY are being poured into a space program.
Taxes +4

2. “The project certainly is feasible, but very expensive,” says @@NAME@@ Space Agency Head @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We could make it less of a burden on the taxpayers if we sought funding from private industry — advertisements on the side of our rockets, selling contracts to the Arms Manufacturing industry, that kind of thing.”
The Results: the nation’s first space rocket — sponsored by Pepsi and shaped like an enormous soda bottle — is being developed.
Taxes +2

3. “If God had meant Man to fly, he would have given us solid rocket boosters instead of legs,” says religious type @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We should not be looking to the stars, but rather inside our own hearts. That’s why we should abandon this so-called space program, and instead make the teaching of religion mandatory in all schools.”
The Results: religious classes are compulsory for all school students
Civil Right -4
Taxes -1
Godlessness -2
Religiousness +2

—————————————————————————–
#039: Scandal Rocks @@NAME@@’s Government! [The SLAGLands; ed:The SLAGLands]

The Issue
A tabloid magazine, The National Incriminator, has revealed the sordid details of an affair between one of your top advisors, Robert Lotsalovin, and his secretary.

The Debate
1. “They found out I did WHAT?!” Advisor Lotsalovin says in his morning meeting in your office. “This just can’t happen! How can government officials do their jobs properly if we have to work under the constant scrutiny of these idiotic supermarket tabloids? I say tabloid newspapers must be banned, and we must not allow newspapers to speak ill of our government officials… for the good of @@NAME@@, of course…”
The Results: newspapers may not print any negative stories about the government.
Economy -3

2. “Unbelievable!” says Reverend @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the local Catholic church. “Our government officials must be held to a higher standard than this! Mr. Lotsalovin must be removed from office and jailed. We cannot allow such disgusting corruption within the halls of justice!”
The Results: government officials are held to the highest standard of morality.
Taxes +1
Compassion +1
Corruption -6
Godlessness -4
Ideological Radicality -1
Law Enforcement +1
Niceness +1
Pacifism +2
Religiousness +4
Rudeness -1
Safety +6
Social Conservatism -1
Weather +2
Welfare +1

3. “Whoa, whoa, hey, now…” argues Senator @@RANDOMNAME@@. “What happened to Mr. Lotsalovin is no different than affairs that happen all over @@NAME@@ every day! Before you know it, they’ll be after YOUR sexual history! I think what we need to do is take the public attention off of it somehow, perhaps by… oh, I don’t know… giving them a tax cut! That’ll divert their attention from this momentary distraction just long enough for Mr. Lotsalovin’s divorce process to end!”
The Results: government officials frequently cut taxes as a distraction from antics with their secretaries.
Economy -1
Political Freedoms -2
Taxes -1

Issues 000-020

#000: Should Democracy Be Compulsory?

The Issue
In response to a slow news week, certain highbrow newspapers have stirred up the debate over voluntary vs compulsory voting.

The Debate
1. “Compulsory voting makes about as much sense as having the death penalty for attempted suicide,” says civil rights activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “You can’t force people to be free! You can only give them the choice. Besides, if all those derelicts who can’t be bothered to get off their butts once every few years voted, who would they elect? I shudder to think.”
The Result: voting is voluntary

2. “It’s not contradictory at all,” argues political commentator @@RANDOMNAME@@. “The fact is, if not everyone votes, the outcome isn’t truly representative. Some groups–like elderly gun nuts–vote more often than others. That’s why we always end up with such terrible politicians.”
The Result: voting is compulsory

• Political Freedom -3

3. “This raises an interesting issue,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your brother. “And that is: why do we need elections, anyway? Seems to me it would be much simpler if you just decided what was right, and did it. Wouldn’t that save everyone a lot of time?”
The Result: elections have been outlawed

---

#001: Where’s The Love Gone?

The Issue
Last night the respected tabloid TV show “60 Minutes” ran a report on @@NAME@@’s rising divorce rate. What is happening to the nuclear family?

The Debate
1. “There’s a simple solution,” says Pastor Felix, of the Catholic Church. “Divorce should be illegal. ‘For better or worse,’ anyone remember how that goes? We should return to the good old days, when you got married for life and stuck by your partner no matter how much of a drunken, abusive, adulterating disappointment they turned out to be.”
The Result: divorce is illegal

• Civil rights -6

2. John Black, author of the hit book, ‘Men are from Mars, Women are from Some Whole Other Place,’ has a simpler solution. “If couples would just call each other ‘darling’ once in a while, there would be far fewer relationship breakdowns. A little affection is all it takes. So the government should make it mandatory: call your spouse ‘darling’ at least once a day, or face a fine.”
The Result: married couples must call each other “darling” or risk a fine

• Civil rights -4
• Compassion -1

3. “There’s a simple way to boost the marriage rate,” says gay rights activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Abolish those archaic laws that discriminate against same-sex marriages. It’s obscene to treat people differently because of their sexual preference. Besides, everyone knows gay relationships are more stable than straight ones.”
The Result: same-sex marriages are increasingly common

• Civil rights +1
• Taxes +1

---

#002: Reclaim The Streets!

The Issue
Several major city streets were clogged with bicycles this morning, as the environmental group ‘Two Wheels Good, Four Wheels Bad’ staged a protest. Several hundred riders ambled through downtown streets, blissfully ignoring the torrent of abuse hurled at them by thousands of motorists running late for work.

The Debate
1. “People are sick of dirty, smelly automobiles,” said protest organizer @@RANDOMNAME@@. “They’re choking the city, the environment–our lives! Cars must be banned!”
The Result: cars are banned.

• Economy -25
• Taxes +7

2. “The only thing people are sick of is long-haired idiots riding their bicycles at two miles an hour on major thoroughfares,” says committed motorist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “People shouldn’t be able to protest like this. The government needs to crack down on them.”
The Result: bicyclists are banned from major roads.

• Political freedoms -8

3. The Automotive Manufacturers Association, meanwhile, has called for government support. “It’s clear that we need to boost the level of automobile support in this country. This protest this morning is a clear indication of… um… anyway, we need more government funds.”
The Result: the automotive industry soaks up huge government handouts

• Taxes +3
• Economy +27
• Industry: Automobile Manufacturing +2

---

#003: Harry Potter Censorship Row

The Issue
The latest “Harry Potter” book to hit schools across @@NAME@@ has stirred up the greatest controversy yet.

The Debate
1. “I quite enjoyed the book, until I got to the part where Harry summons evil demons to do his bidding,” says religious leader @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Now that’s just wrong. We need to restore some sense to this debate, by which I mean we should remove this book from the shelves, salt it thoroughly, and burn it.”
The Result: Harry Potter books are banned

• Civil Rights -4
• Taxes +1

2. Teachers union President @@RANDOMNAME@@ says, “Come on, the book is fantasy! And it’s a damn good read. I’d like the government to issue a statement of support for our teachers and librarians, so kids can enjoy good books without interference from religious wackos, like Christians.”
The Result: the latest Harry Potter book is a bestseller

• Civil Rights +7
• Economy +1
• Industry: Book Publishing +1

---

#004: Economic Collapse Looms!

The Issue
Big business, fed up with over-regulation in @@NAME@@, are heading offshore in ever-increasing numbers.

The Debate
1. “Good riddance!” says noted environmentalist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Sniff that air! It’s never been so clean! At last, our society is freeing itself from the consumer death-trap! I say it’s time to take the final step and outlaw capitalism once and for all!”
The Result: =ISSUE NOT YET EXPERIENCED=

2. “This is a catastrophe waiting to happen,” says the Chamber of Commerce. “Think of the consequences! Without big business, where do the jobs come from? Where do we get our medicine? Our cars? Our latest fashions? There are dozens of useless regulations the government could abolish today to make life easier for commerce, and it’s high time they did.”
The Result: =ISSUE NOT YET EXPERIENCED=

---

 

#005: Child Casino Shock

The Issue
Children as young as eight have been spotted gambling in some of @@NAME@@’s seedier casinos.

The Debate
1. Social activist @@RANDOMNAME@@ is outraged. “Gambling needs to be outlawed immediately. It’s no wonder children are becoming sucked into the vice, with adults setting such a poor example. Gambling is a stain on @@NAME@@’s international reputation and it must be stopped!”
The Result: gambling is outlawed.

• Economy -8
• Taxes +1

2. However, Crown Casino chairperson @@RANDOMNAME@@ says, “What’s wrong with children gambling? It prepares them for the realities of life, teaching them that success or failure is not due to hard work or intelligence, but the roll of the dice. Besides, if kids weren’t gambling, they’d be spraypainting trains.”
The Result: young children are regularly seen wagering pocket money at blackjack tables.

• Taxes -9
• Economy +22
• Industry: gambling +1

---

#006: Appointment Of Spiritual Advisor

The Issue
It’s time for the government to hire a new religious advisor. Your people have narrowed down the candidates to:

The Debate
1. Catholic Archbishop @@RANDOMNAME@@: boasts an excellent track record, having rapidly increased church attendances in his constituencies through the “Reaching God Through Guilt” program. Seen as a solid choice.
The Result: the government is seen to favor Catholics

• Godlessness -5
• Corruption +2

2. New Age thinker @@RANDOMNAME@@: a left-field candidate with some radical ideas. “For me, it’s not about the name of your religion. It’s about discovering your spirituality in whatever guise that takes. Some people call that a cult: I call it taking spirituality to the people.”
The Result: the government’s religious works are headed by a New Age guru

• Taxes +1

3. Finally, there’s @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If I am awarded the appointment, I will immediately resign,” the ex-schoolteacher has declared. “Because, frankly, God is a big load of hokey. I’ll be doing everyone a favor by just shutting up about it.”
The Result: the government is avowedly atheist

• Taxes -1

---

#007: Animal Liberation Front Strikes Again

The Issue
The increasingly militant Animal Liberation Front struck again last night, freeing dozens of chickens bound for delicious snack packs.

The Debate
1. “These nuts have got to be stopped,” demands concerned consumer @@RANDOMNAME@@. “They need to face the fact people want snack packs, no matter how many innocent chickens must be sacrificed. Besides, chickens would do the same to us if they had the chance.”
The Result: Animal Liberationists are regularly jailed.

• Political Freedoms -5
• Civil Rights -4

2. “These Liberationists are highlighting an important issue,” pleads @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Too often, animals are put through needless cruelty, just to make their flesh taste a little more deliciously succulent. I’m sure we could ban the more horrific abuses without putting too much of a dent in our national obesity figures. Couldn’t we?”
The Result: meat-eating is frowned upon

3. “Animals have feelings too!” yelled protestor @@RANDOMNAME@@, before being set upon by hungry passers-by. “Free the animals! Ban meat-eating!”
The Result: vegetarianism is compulsory

4. Economist @@RANDOMNAME@@ has an alternative. “You don’t need to take away the people’s right to choose. You just need to build the costs of animal suffering into the price. A tax on meat-eating, in proportion to the amount of cruelty involved, would do the trick. Plus think of the benefit for the national coffers! Of course, poor people wouldn’t be able to afford meat, but that’s just more incentive for them to get jobs.”
The Result: meat is a luxury afforded only to the wealthy

• Taxes +2
• Social Conservatism +3
• Wealth Gaps +1

 

 

---

#008: Nudists Demand Time In Sun

The Issue
A loose coalition of sartorially-challenged individuals known as “Let It All Hang Out” has called on the government to relax public nudity laws.

The Debate
1. “For too long, our bodies have been trapped in these prisons of cotton and polyester!” yelled protester @@RANDOMNAME@@, while apparently developing a nasty case of sunburn. “We must repeal the puritanical laws that make public nudity a crime. My body–my choice to dangle!”
The Result: citizens can be frequently spotted going about their business stark naked

• Civil Rights +2
• Nudity +3

2. “I agree,” mused sociology professor @@RANDOMNAME@@. “But I don’t think the protestors are going far enough. Public nudity shouldn’t be an option: it should be compulsory. Nudity is highly liberating. And it would put that disgusting “Hooters” out of business once and for all.”
The Result: public nudity is compulsory

• Civil Rights -11
• Nudity +190
• Averageness +18

3. “Whoa, whoa,” says noted accountant @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Are these people serious? The last thing I want to see when I’m out for a coffee is some lumbering, over-weight nudist coming down the sidewalk toward me. If people want to get naked, they can do it in the privacy of their own homes. Think of the children!”
The Result: nudity is frowned upon

• Social Conservatism +4

—————————————————–

#009: @@ANIMAL@@s On The Dinner Table?

The Issue
In a bid to provide a new revenue stream for @@NAME@@’s Beef-Based Agriculture industry, it has been suggested that @@ANIMAL@@s could be added to the menu.

The Debate
1. “The fact is, the @@ANIMAL@@ population is out of control,” says Beef-Based Agriculture spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. “We have to do something about them anyway, so why not market them as tasty snacks? We could have @@ANIMAL@@ kebabs, @@ANIMAL@@ pies, @@ANIMAL@@-on-a-sticks–the possibilities are endless! Let’s not pass up this golden opportunity to provide a feast, if you will, for our economy.”
The Result: @@ANIMAL@@s are considered a delicacy

• Economy +5
• Taxes +1

2. “I agree that something needs to be done about @@ANIMAL@@ over-population,” says random passer-by @@RANDOMNAME@@, “but eating them? That’s kind of gross. Let’s just shoot the ones we have to and shovel their bodies into ditches like normal.”
The Result: a nation-wide cull of @@ANIMAL@@s is in effect.

• Economy +2

3. “I am shocked and appalled!” declared SPCA President @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If anyone needs to be culled, it’s us humans. The @@ANIMAL@@s were here first, remember? We need to take this as a sign to get our industry–agriculture in particular–to back off. The @@ANIMAL@@ is part of what makes @@NAME@@ a great nation!”
The Result: the @@ANIMAL@@ is a protected species

• Civil rights -3
• Economy +5
• Taxes -1
• Averageness +2

---

#010: Social Inequality Reaching Embarrassing Levels

The Issue
Commentators have warned that @@NAME@@’s social inequalities threaten to make it an international pariah.

The Debate
1. “Look, I don’t like it either,” said Chamber of Commerce spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Just on the way here, I had to step over three homeless people, and one of my shoes got caught on a beggar. But inequality is the price we pay for economic strength. If anything, we need fewer taxes, so those of us who are well-off can afford to be more generous. If we want to, that is.”
The Result: the streets are increasingly clogged with poverty-stricken beggars

• Economy +3
• Taxes -3

2. “I think we’ve forgotten what economic strength is all about,” says social worker @@RANDOMNAME@@. “The economy is meant to be a means to a high standard of living, not an end in itself. It’s become an excuse for the rich to prosper while the poor fall through the cracks. Not everyone is poor because they don’t feel like working. We must provide more welfare.”
The Result: the government is slowly introducing social welfare programs.

• Economy -7
• Taxes +3
• Happiness +1
• Welfare +4
• Wealth Gaps -1

3. “Who says we’re an international pariah?” demands military honcho @@RANDOMNAME@@. “What are their names? If that’s the way the international community feels, we obviously need to prepare for war.”
The Result: the country is preparing for war

• Civil Rights -2
• Economy -1
• Political Freedoms -10
• Taxes +2
• Ideological Radicality +4
• Weather -8

---

#011: People Request Not So Much Dictatorship, If That’s All Right

The Issue
While effusively praising @@NAME@@’s leadership and bowing repeatedly, a delegation has humbly requested that the government take a more “modernistic” view in the future.

The Debate
1. The High Minister for Finance, who also happens to be your brother, dismisses the claim. “What these people fail to realize is that you know what’s best for them. The alternative is anarchy! I say stick to your course. And execute these wackos for treason.”
The Result: political activists are routinely executed

• Civil Rights -9
• Political Freedoms – Absolutely 0

2. “Perhaps the people could be given some more political freedoms,” muses your Chief of Staff, who is your sister. “Is there really such harm in allowing public discussion of ideas? We could even have a real Opposition Party. One that isn’t just full of your puppets, I mean.”
The Result: the government is cutting back on the number of political prisoners executed each year

• Civil Rights +2
• Political Freedoms +22

---

#012: Death Penalty On Agenda

The Issue
Following a tragic double-murder, capital punishment has surged as an election issue. There now appears a real possibility that right-wing candidate @@RANDOMNAME@@, running on a “Do the Crime, pay the Penalty” platform, will gain power. While society’s intelligentsia is outraged, debate rages as to whether the government should intervene.

The Debate
1. “This is a democracy, remember?” rhetorically questions Professor @@RANDOMNAME@@ of the University of Greater @@NAME@@. “That means that if the people want something, the people get it. I hate to say it, but in the name of political freedom, we need to accept that our country will have the death penalty.”
The Result: the death penalty has been reintroduced

• Civil Rights -3
• Political Freedoms +9

2. “I’m sorry,” says Civil Rights Unionist @@RANDOMNAME@@, “but this travesty cannot be allowed to pass. If the government needs to crack down on lunatic fringe groups in order to keep our great nation free of the death penalty, then so be it. We must ban the politics of hatred and fear!”
The Result: extreme political groups are outlawed

• Civil Rights +3
• Political Freedoms -17

---

#013: Too Much Yakking, Already, Say Delegation

The Issue
Some people say @@NAME@@’s policy on free speech has gone too far.

The Debate
1. “These days, anyone says whatever they want with no regard to what kind of dribble is coming out of their mouths!” says angry commuter @@RANDOMNAME@@. “It’s gone too far. We should go back to the good old days, when if someone started talking garbage, we’d smack them one.”
The Result: the right to free speech is being drastically curtailed

• Civil Rights -2

2. “We need more free speech, not less,” argues civil rights campaigner @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Free speech allows ideas to be explored, challenged, and discussed in a productive, open forum. It teaches our kids to be critical thinkers. And dirty words, of course, but that’s just the price you pay.”
The Result: NATION’s children are widely acknowledged as the most foul-mouthed in the region

• Civil Rights +1

3. “The right to free speech is a central tenet of our system of democracy,” says religious leader @@RANDOMNAME@@. “But surely the right to not have your religious beliefs mocked by others is worth something, too? We mustn’t put up with intolerance!”
The Result: it is a crime to offend someone’s religious beliefs

• Civil Rights -2
• Taxes +1

---

#014: Military Demands Increased Spending

The Issue
The Department of Defense has put its case for a substantial increase in funding for the coming financial year.

The Debate
1. “These are turbulent times we live in,” says Defense Chief @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Turbulent and dangerous. And the only sensible response to that, of course, is to build a lot more weapons. Unless we get the funding we need, I can’t promise that we’ll be able to defend @@NAME@@’s sovereign borders from rogue nations and foreign powers. Or those leaky boatloads of refugees, for that matter.”
The Result: military spending is on the increase

• Political freedoms -13
• Defense Forces +9
• Ideological Radicality +1
• Weaponization +5

2. “NO MORE BOMBS,” chant the protestors outside Parliament House, in a repetitious and increasingly annoying appeal. Spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@, speaking through a feedback-afflicted microphone, says, “@@NAME@@ needs fewer weapons, not more! Make the world a safer place! Disarm now!”
The Result: military funding has been stripped back

• Taxes -6
• Defense Forces -6
• Industry: Arms Manufacturing -1
• Law Enforcement -1
• Pacifism +2
• Safety -2
• Weaponization -5

---

#015: More Police Needed

The Issue
As crime rates rise, some in the community are calling for increased policing.

The Debate
1. “Just the other day, I got mugged in the broad daylight!” says ruffian @@RANDOMNAME@@. “And the ironic thing is I had just stuck up this other guy. When muggers are getting mugged, even I have to admit that crime has gotten out of control. We do need more police.”
The Result: the police force is on a recruitment drive

• Safety +2
• Safety from crime +1

2. “The solution to crime is not more police!” says noted sociologist and occasional crime novelist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Studies repeatedly show that crime is caused by poverty and poor education. Increase government spending in these areas, and crime will fall! Maybe not overnight, but it will happen.”
The Result: education and welfare spending are on the rise

• Taxes +4

3. “Yeah, good luck with that,” says conservative leader and gun enthusiast @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Look, we do need more police, that’s clear. But that’s not enough. We need real punishments: sentences that will act as a genuine deterrent to people considering a life of crime. Like public floggings.”
The Result: thieves are flogged in public for their crimes.

• Civil Rights -1
• Political Freedoms -23
• Taxes +1

---

#016: @@MAJORINDUSTRY@@ Workers Strike!

The Issue
Workers across the nation have gone out on indefinite strike over what they claim are substandard wages in the @@MAJORINDUSTRY@@ industry.

The Debate
1. “We are the backbone of this country, and we demand a fair wage rise!” says union leader @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I don’t think a 20% increase over two years is too much to ask. Unless the government forces employers to give us our due, we’ll shut this whole industry down! Let’s see how well @@NAME@@’s economy manages without any @@MAJORINDUSTRY@@, huh?”
The Result: the nation is ravaged by daily union strikes

• Economy: -2 to -12
• Taxes: 0 to +3

2. “We pay our employees very generous wages,” says employer representative @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Especially when you consider that without us, they’d be OUT ON THE STREET. Hear that, you scumbags? OUT ON THE STREET! Anyway, my point is, if you cave in, you make our entire industry uncompetitive. You can’t do that in the global marketplace. It’ll hurt the whole country. The best solution, economically speaking, would be to relax industrial laws and allow us to fire troublemakers on the spot.”
The Result: employers may fire workers without giving any reason.

• Economy: +10 -to +50
• Taxes: -2 to -8

---

#017: Corporations Demand Political Say

The Issue
A well-heeled lobby group is pushing for the elimination of regulations that prevent corporations from donating money to political parties.

The Debate
1. “This is supposed to be a democratic country,” @@MAJORINDUSTRY@@ industry spokesperson @@RANDOMNAME@@ says. “Yet these archaic laws say I can’t donate money to support a political party. They put ceilings on the amount any party can spend on advertising. It’s time to stop treating voters like children, and trust them to make up their own minds. Free the ballot box!”
The Result: corporations donate huge sums of money to favored politicians.

• Taxes -1
• Political Freedoms +20
• Economy +50
• Corruption +3

2. “You say political freedom, I hear vote-buying,” says popular anarchist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If these fat cats get their way, politicians will buy their own seat in Congress. And let’s face it, a slick advertising campaign can convince a lot of apathetic voters. We need to tighten the laws, not repeal them. Money should have no place in politics!”
The Result: political parties are banned from advertising and receiving private donations

• Economy -35
• Political Freedoms -15
• Taxes +4
• Corruption -2

3. “Frankly, I don’t see why we need to have elections at all,” says your brother, @@RANDOMNAME@@, over a late-night malt whiskey. “You always seem to know what’s best. Why not scrap the whole political system? It would make things so much simpler.”
The Result: a dictator has seized power and outlawed elections

• Civil rights -57
• Ideological Radicality +5
• Happiness -2

---

#018: Citizens Struggle Under “Unfair” Tax Burden

The Issue
A recent poll has revealed high levels of dissatisfaction among the populace about tax rates.

The Debate
1. “Do you know how much of my year’s work goes to the government?” demanded angry worker @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Too much! Government spending has gotten way out of control. It needs big cuts in welfare, health, and education. But leave those subsidies to business alone. We need them to create jobs.”
The Result: the government is reining in public spending

• Taxes -8

2. “It’s not the AMOUNT of tax, it’s where the burden falls,” says student activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “And at the moment, far too much of the burden is falling on the poor. People on high incomes still have more money than people on low incomes. I don’t think I need to say anything more than that.”
The Result: high-income earners pay a 100% tax rate.

• Economy -1
• Taxes +2
• Wealth Gaps -18

3. “I don’t object to the amount of tax, I object to where it’s being spent,” says social reformer @@RANDOMNAME@@. “I’d like to see everyone have a choice as to where their @@CURRENCY@@s go every time they fill out a tax return. Everyone would feel a lot better about opening their wallets if they had a say as to where the money went. I think you’d see a lot more public money going to education and a lot less to business.”
The Result: citizens select which government department gets their income tax CURRENCYs each year

• Economy -12

---

#019: @@NAME@@ Awash With Red-Rimmed Eyes

The Issue
National marijuana consumption has hit an all-time high, with alarming results, a new poll has found.

The Debate
1. “My factory’s productivity is down ten percent since marijuana was decriminalized,” complains employer @@RANDOMNAME@@. “And the number of thefts from the candy machine is off the scale. This so-called ‘pot’ needs to be banned in all public places. Let the junkies do what they want at home, but not in my workplace.”
The Result: marijuana is legal in the privacy of your own home

• Civil Rights -2

2. “Whoa, dude, no need to get, like, you know,” says Free Your Mind campaigner @@RANDOMNAME@@, from his parents’ basement. “This is, like, a personal choice issue, you know. It’s like… whoa, just back off what I want to do with my own body. Don’t let the fascists win, man. There are some hot new eckies coming in soon, they should be legal too.”
The Result: all recreational drugs are legal

• Civil Rights +7
• Recreational Drug Use +100

---

#020: Gunman Kills Three

The Issue
Tragedy struck @@NAME@@ today, as a gunman killed three people in a suburban shooting rampage. The community is united in grief, but divided in opinion as to what should be done.

The Debate
1. The strongest voices demand tighter gun controls. “The only way to prevent further atrocities is to take the guns out of the hands of the murderers,” says anti-gun campaigner @@RANDOMNAME@@. “There’s no justification for them in today’s society. We need tighter regulations on who can hold guns, so only our police and military have them.”
The Results: guns are banned.

• Civil Rights -3

2. “That’s not all we need,” says radical left-wing activist @@RANDOMNAME@@. “The government should ban all guns outright–even in the police force. This is an opportunity to make @@NAME@@ a totally gun-free state.”
The Results: the nation is completely gun-free.

• Civil Rights -4
• Safety -3
• Safety from Crime -1

3. “Guns don’t kill people, people kill people,” says NRA head honcho @@RANDOMNAME@@. “If you outlaw guns, only outlaws will have guns. Is that what we want? Think, people. The answer isn’t to ban guns. It’s to crack down on those Hollywood movies and computer games that glamorize violence. They’re the real criminals.”
The Results: movies and computer games are strictly censored for violence

• Civil Rights -2
• Compassion -2
• Health +0.5
• Influence +1
• Niceness -2
• Pacifism -3
• Recreational Drug Use -1
• Rudeness +2
• Safety -7
• Safety from Crime -2
• Weather -4