Issues 221-240

#226: Expats Plea For Help In War-Torn Country [The Mones Islands; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
Thousands of migrant citizens and expatriated citizens of @@NAME@@ have asked the government to take them home from Marche Noir, a faraway country on the brink of a terrible and violent civil war.

The Debate
1. “We must co-ordinate with the government of Marche Noir in order to secure our absentee voters- ahem- citizens who are in their country,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Foreign Affairs. “We must also create an emergency fund to assist our expats and help bring them back to @@NAME@@. No matter where any of our people are, they’re still ours and our responsibility.”
The Results: the nation has welcomed its expats back with open arms.

2. “That’s rubbish,” objects @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Finance. “Why waste hundreds of thousands of @@CURRENCY@@s in bringing those expatriated citizens back to @@NAME@@? They chose to leave our great country; they are no longer our concern! They could have stayed here and been an asset to our workforce! Helped us grow strong! No, they’ve had their chance. You reap what you sow. We should cut any financial assistance we give to those traitors.”
The Results: citizens who leave the country are officially classed as traitors.
Taxes -1

3. “That’s a good point,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Civics. “Our people are the generators of the economy. The expats should be allowed to come back, but only if they stay. If we keep letting our citizens emigrate, then we’re losing our doctors, our teachers, our skilled and unskilled workforce to damn foreigners! Close the borders to those wanting to leave our nation. If they can’t see how wonderful @@NAME@@ is then we’ll make them!”
The Results: the world outside is only known of in folklore.
Civil Rights -1

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#237: Tourists On Death Row [The New Inquisitors; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
A group of holidaymakers from @@NAME@@ have been arrested while visiting the scenic, yet corrupt and totalitarian, nation of Maxtopia on charges of drug trafficking – an offence which carries the maximum sentence of the death penalty. The story has provoked outrage from citizens, many believing the government should intervene to bring the tourists back home.

The Debate
1. “Everyone knows what barbarians those Maxtopians are!” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, parent to one of the arrestees. “They’ve not even allowed my son and his friends access to lawyers! That government is as corrupt as they are cruel, my boy would never have anything to do with drugs! You need to do something to save them, I’m begging you! I’m sure the Maxtopian officials will back down if you threaten trade sanctions or something. Right?”
The Result: international tensions are high as NATION threatens any government with the audacity to arrest its citizens.

2. “You’ve got to see it from the other side,” argues @@RANDOMNAME@@, a customs official. “While it’s unfortunate that the sentence is so stiff, they really shouldn’t have been smuggling drugs. I’m sure we wouldn’t be happy if Maxtopians came over here with banned goods. I just can’t sympathise: they were greedy, they broke the law, they got caught. What makes them so special that they should be bailed out? At the taxpayers’ expense I might add. Let them be – it’ll show we respect the judicial rights of other countries.”
The Result: the people are furious with the government for allowing citizens to be executed for petty crimes in foreign countries.
Law Enforcement +2
Pacifism +1
Averageness +0.025

3. “I agree,” chimes in @@RANDOMNAME@@, an anti-drug campaigner, waving a banner which reads ‘Don’t Be a Fool, Drugs Aren’t Cool’. “Did you ever stop to think that our foreign neighbours might have the right idea? A zero-tolerance attitude to the drugs issue is what this country needs! Death to the dealers!”
The Result: drug-related crimes carry the death penalty.
Civil Rights -3

4. “You people are so quick to lay the finger of blame,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, an ambassador at @@NAME@@’s embassy in Maxtopia. “My motto has always been ‘If you want something, give something away’. It is the government’s duty to protect its citizens from harm! We don’t want to cause too much international friction by making a mockery of their laws so we’ve got to settle things more diplomatically: they scratch our backs now and we’ll scratch theirs later.”
The Result: NATION’s soft-touch approach to diplomacy has made it known as the ‘push-over’ of the region.

5. “That’s what they want! Leverage!” hollers @@RANDOMNAME@@, your Minister of Defence, storming into your office. “Advances in our markets, political favours – they’ll do anything to undermine us! They’ve always hated us, those rats! If you ask me, this brouhaha isn’t about drugs – it’s a spit in our eye, that’s what it is! What kind of people execute kids for having a few ounces on them? We ought to give them a good bombing, then they’ll know how a proper country behaves!”
The Result: the government is well known for declaring war on other countries for suspected slights.
Taxes +1

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#239: We Who Are About To Die Would Rather Go Home [The Lost Romans; ed:Sirocco]

The Issue
An old supporter of yours has recently passed on, leaving a quite sizeable plot of land to you in his will – but only under a rather unusual condition: that the site be developed into a colosseum for hosting gladiatorial fights and other bloody spectacles.

The Debate
1. “Yes, yes!” cries @@RANDOMNAME@@, waving a wooden sword enthusiastically. “You’ve gotta do this, man! Gladiator fights are like the ultimate in spectator sports! And it doesn’t just have to be people! We could pit man against @@ANIMAL@@! Blade against claw! Nothing to their names but their wits and their stamina! You’d have to pay people a lot to risk their lives doing this but I bet you’d earn a whole lot more from merchandise and wagers and stuff!”
The Result: it is a common belief that a sport isn’t sport if there are no decapitations.
Economy +3

2. “That’s just sick,” says @@RANDOMNAME@@, president of the Kill Violence Now Association. “I don’t believe you’d find anyone willing to watch actual people tearing each other apart. It’s savage and horrible! It’s even worse than boxing! Violent sports should be outlawed for the sake of this country’s moral integrity. I’m sorry, I’ve got to go – I’m ashamed you’re even considering this.”
The Result: badminton was recently banned due to ‘unacceptable violence’ inherent to the game.
Economy -2

3. “Actually, we could use this to our advantage,” whispers Chief of Police, @@RANDOMNAME@@. “Why not just force convicted criminals to fight for the amusement of the public? They’ll be paying for their crimes, contributing to society, and totally freeing us of having to build jails to throw their useless hides in!”
The Result: criminals are thrown to the ANIMALs to repay their debt to society.
Civil Rights -1
Taxes -3

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